Episode 142: Fake Sex (w/Ben Schwartz!)


Comedian/Actor/Friend Ben Schwartz joins us to discuss on screen romance.

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if I where you let’s get started part to
a bar observer the very body Ben

Schwartz things gotta re

you’ll she suny yeah

she passed to me yeah

you must be


many the new questions

his family

show shemale can GQ them you will help

them a skill

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me medicine missing me

the No

subhuman said





Stephen Mills to know she was being a
little song drive back to back episodes

very for to it iz

very very but thank you to you a

Alex sector was last week’s and Stephen
a Mills was this one as a catchy tune

yevgeny for great by the way yeah based
on your gums Jake take another pair Siri

comes later DJIA

radio and you know I’m you love ’em dead
I’m on top bandana Mumbai domicile

devised by Bryan husky from the united
under down to pursue their Denham

at a Rio baby then I’ll call the denim
and because it all guides on the phone

they are Union Jack leaky Roland

other key projects me at the door are
religious get started this is a if I

were you

the only buys podcast on the internet
hosted by ban on the mir

I’m Josh the whole to buy me some hoes
by Ben we’re gonna leave the microphones


one is it over it’s sort of a baton
passes all I would change the show

totally that Hagel at all

judge at the whole format everybody
today years and never be allowed on

you wish you just talk about drumming
yeah yeah he put a cap on that look

closer and over

i close to where you crazy you play with
you play with the devil you play with

liar but it yeah blow their ben was on
our last episode I ran a little long so

we’re going to make a two-parter to

Part II and Parmer he he

only three part harmony but that’s why I
wanted to do it I wanna be in the

better um I had a couple questions reas

well let me ask let me ask a question at
all sorts of my journey

and in time impressive journey we need a
guy’s name by the way we’re supposed to

write if there is a high

I’m because we’re doing it for two hours
and change it is nowhere right and the

guys in any

is that the is a guy it today

I you know um you love them a

Michael buoys

any relation though to Donovan bradley’s

I quick question if you know what you’re

how big is your at-home I

is a penis knives yes I read yes I have
been a southern thing

we there’s the article recently that
like announced the average male the


more is it I it actually a little less
than five in half

really I I was like in america and if
you haven’t happened six or something I

think by the app is the like

universal is the world average and in
america’s arsenal less than five and


why do Americans have small penises in
the world autonomy Asiri

go the city doesn’t she says go fuck
yourself now while we’re

as a professional bus service into trip
they I

hey guys are cut to the chase my
girlfriend and I are leaving for college

soon and I love this girl and I can’t
see myself without her

she’s an actor which is awesome then we
had the discussion about her being in a

role where she will have to kiss
somebody else

I’m the only guy she’s ever done
anything with and this makes me even

more against her being in that role

what bothers me more that kissing her is
something that I only see myself doing

it’s that small intimate thing that is
special to me

and I feel like a shitty boyfriend every
time I’ve

think like this but I don’t want her but
I don’t think it should be something I

have to share

what bothers me more is just that she
doesn’t seem to care about kissing

another guy

and I’m the bad guy but am I really that
bad if I just don’t want to kiss

somebody else

or make out with strangers on stage in
front of a bunch of other strangers when

she doesn’t even do that with me in
front of people

I want to be able to just nip this in
the bud and a and be a better boyfriend

but I think

have but I think I find it hard to %uh
is it true that suppress yeah

what does that mean if it in the bud at
the little nip nip it in the bud light


before by our Terms looms I’ll Wow yeah
wrong all time

as one nip this in the bud and be a
better boyfriend but I find it hard to

watch my girl for make out with some
dude then be expected to clap afterwards

obviously I’m extremely jealous

so that definitely adds to the issue as
well but still what

I do help places guy like went off the

as she is riding with you know yeah but
also an angry Amir read it like that as

well and over a mirror-like

now is my design child yeah so what’s
the deal with these guys are pretty

you acted in a way that led us to
interpret this exact same ol

the bill lol you MEDLINE

well all 10 the other day go luxury

embryos go I I will go well

this is how Bad’s gonna hurt I bet on
I’ve never seen you doing impression

that like now part of your comedy thing
I can do to pression I love

arm the woodchuck in full house sale tip

credit yep bold your I’ll aargh

other side come out to do that also
snoogle from murdering

all blow over hope I’ll deal habits is

for a lot of pop up close but

it’s so bizarre what else can I do they
should never do a couple

not very well let that allows a new a
bit on a cartoon for life three years

Danny Cunningham

I do the great randy cunningham record
it yet however watchers

are ya 100 up so two seasons Jesus
Christ they’re crazy

yeah coming together Alicia 0 you outta

she wanted to bring you we knock on the
trailer all

door and he’s never let us then a
they’re saving voice-overs a trailers

so let’s let’s talk about this short
before crashing questions are

no I dating actress who has to kiss
another guy

this is the problem and it’s going to be
a problem for ever unfortunately if you

did actress

she is going to have roles especially if
she’s a female

that she’s going to have to kiss the
opposite sex

and it is very weird

and I have gone through that weirdness I

there’s no other profession outsider
pornography I guess but is there any

other profession that

%um by the kissing is the lowest I’ve
had teams we have sex with women and

your naked with them in some by that

on my dad the tax lawyer and he’s cute

where he is he’s had to have sex your
hook up with the secretary acting troupe

that’s not true well

Nadal is actually really feels terrible
really wanna know how their whole family

I have always ago

yeah he really wanted to play me like
Ben think it’s not acting hey only

professionally healthiest

just somebody mad at it we prove me
wrong children prove me wrong to a


yet prove me wrong with Iraq killed
children premiere of I

premiere on and tell me is another
profession that forces you kiss somebody

acting a lip doctor no gonna

a real profession our CPR I

I busy let’s get them out that’s good
that’s not the mouth ASA Wright

before doctors each other naked doctor
see visions they get yeah

but imagine if you got this to your
husband lifeguard for saving a life like

you were making out with that chick who
was incredible

to I saw the light come back in two or
higher yeah that’s how hard you’re

kissing her you were frenching her and I
like the other the other version this is


i’ve been waiting five years that warm
in the Chokin something story

kiss I that the rear bumper and the lady
didn’t make it

I to see you OC she’s dead I’m not yet

you kissed her to death a yeah baby you
cheated on me with the courts are

baby me up I kissed a corp so hard it
came back to life

I like health unlikely hero book so
creepy sir

by their part is he knows that he
explains that’s why it bothers him less

if like we did not like what bothers me
is that kissing her something that I

only see myself doing

it a little thing that I have do you
think he would have ended kissing is

that what you think you did

don’t tell anybody else love you feel
they’re doing it we she’s starting to

bring this smash

lip thing that we do and like I it
turning into a national phenomenon make

you like her

profession it says be like she’s gonna
get roles are just the kids people

and then he goes I just ordered demean
the entire

idea acted like she’s gonna kiss a
stranger on stage in front of a buncha

others finally retire we’re not back on
the grid lab after I guess I’ll a good


I like I’m proud of her oh you mean she
booked a role she’s excited about a lot

of people show up to where

to our show and the people clap
afterwards that doesn’t mean I’d

yeah but at the same time as yet the
press are useful in college together

definitely gonna break up

if she’s the only girl you ever kissed
don’t worry about course

just yeah Witcher Godspeed on her
journey in break up now

Ben what’s the farthest you’ve gone with
a check off-camera


you I

sleep she I

I’m what I’ve added smashmouth

what’s that we take both the ellipse
push them together to go with the guy


national compared to make out there
management layer what’s that what’s that

most intense sexual thing you’ve got a
camera I can ever

I done sex scenes I’ve done making out
sex like

how does that work you and your answer
in Chigwell matters matters with above

bra brush in your own if you’re on a
show that’s on something like she is a


my first sex scene ever the woman was
gorgeous who was

a was had something in her rider that
she sing

because she couldn’t your ass or

a vagina so they couldn’t show

my ass madonna is right there so they
could share with China

leather jacket yeah my God my ass and

at my ass and vagina is it the same
space also I I was able to issue is

wearing see-through

she’s very like skin color panies and I
just were like

tighty whiteys and roll them up so like
whatever but in house haha topless

she was wearing a see-through bra don’t
think she let me by the compressor

but that was just going through the
motions have sex in showing like my


but I’ve been naked with a good

no end in Showtime for Showtime think
they can show my ass they have it I

don’t know

but they make you wear this terrible
thing and call them

modesty sock I think and what it is it’s
like a little pouch in like we were

younger you know

marble walls yeah but you know you put
your penis in it to your to scrunch

all your business together and then you
so take years ago put it all in there

and write up like marble in the tie up
the top old so it can’t lol cant


ol it’s no fun lol no father you could
even get hard if you wanted to know you

can get hard

a fall break their the sack you could
break through that same at Starlite

no because I by the way I been so
nervous about it because

I’ve been did very fortunate were such
lovely nice women are there

who are also gorgeous you’re a mean so
it’s like have ever had to grind against

the topless woman


I she was on top for me you’re in his
pouch and she and her she’s not that I

was wearing my pants stowe

and but she’s grinding on you Billy time
or that pouches with their zeros making

the back of a car settle at a hotel in a

all the other ones like the beginning so
this year I have a couple sex scenes

but its mostly the very beginning on the
right before we start since before it’s

like whatever

you love making out you flow onto the
bed and a good by the way there it’s

crazy because you’re still

like always everytime a Bee go to

whatever your criticize our show there’s
a big estar

its ok whatever you’re comfortable with
whatever you feel like I will do

as well I wanna make you as comfortable
as possible make you feel like this is a

big thing

so if you want to just note on one
hundred percent no touching

anything you wish would be told if I’m
not your decision to make

it not the kind a bill that would urge
for so long that it directly to gather

you need to be other you know will sell

just if you make sure uncomfortable its
crazy if it makes you uncomfortable

there’s no reason a maker and choose
another job sweet hot letter is never

touch that actually no dog at all today
when the All

you’re fired you bite into an onion
butare actresses that

are like let’s do it like we would be
doing let’s do it reelect we would be


that the art man diagram by the way that
that for the most part I believe is the

correct way of doing it

does every do you ever feel connected or

I value yes you do there sometimes the
100 it sit by the same with when you


a woman real-life they sometimes are
like two connected

and Mike oh my god this girl is amazing
at this is a great night as the camera

crew around

and a red sexy they never even had time
to think things but wait when I’ve had

like smooch stuff

they’re like big make out a way I did I
do have a sexy with a fake out make out

and if they expected his first yeah but
was it like there were it was so

Arnold it it I felt nothing there wasn’t

not even a the other that’s what you do
when you’re actually cheating on your

girl friends that’s not look good in the
kitchen a little a new band when you

feel like when you’re telling your
relational I will say this is

I if you’ve ever did an actress before
there is

it’s free it’s weird it’s a weird
feeling that led to carry out so when

you kiss them unlike

owed this week sometime you have a sexy
was somebody are you have a

that girl has a make out there was
someone it’s weird

it is very weird II eight summit this

a it’s hard to get over by Tom he’s

a up he he runs a little bit jealous
regardless but are it’s a tough thing I

don’t know how to explain it because
also like

the it so we are present you can watch
it all Sony watch a person make out like

all the scenes are making all those
girls are on television writer ever

but you’re an actor to use like you have
to be it seems like you’re getting I

understand it totally SSS if you’re like
a random like up

a student or a plumber and then you have
to see your wife for girls castle or and

really really jealous he

big about his seething and his
girlfriend doesn’t have a role she has

the kids and by the way maybe it so if
there’s so many different types a kiss

is it could just be like a little
packing it means nothing

all but if it’s like you know there are
scenes are we done words like really

like we’re on each other she’s all over
me I’m making out there and throw or to

bed so but that’s a totally different
kissing scene then

then I assira see their kiss and right

and say goodbye but it’s a very weird
thing because also

you want your D one try best to be in
the moment like you I learned from

improper that I never lied when track
has gone up with practical but

up for improper you wanna be the moment
to say yes and you wanna make something

with someone else always wanna in a
teeny 18 bike

if that the one we the three thus far on
whether through this right we

we play with each other really talk to
each other we will make it work

with clearly jealous Dexia with
officials at any time we write an

eight-time J comes right that’s a good

I hale-bopp is really funny I

holy as OJ only comes at his own jokes
by the way a service that but there is

this rare moment when you like making
out with someone

and that if you’re single by the way
it’s gonna if you’re single

there’s like no you don’t feel as an

years don’t feel as bad at all but when
you’re it but a you’re going out with

someone to make our someone

you just don’t you use it feels so weird
you know what I mean

is a day earlier to see year to be in
that lake are you feel weak feeling more

weird when you’re making out with you
see your girlfriend making out

2i worse for you we all wanna

oh oh my god if watching a girl lodging
Elliott updating or something like that

yeah of course

how this Seattle when this comes out
worst thing I could imagine is being the


a having a girl be upset going making
out and then coming home

and heifers covers that decision how was

how is that how was the scene it was

it was a fine day but think about sex
scenes when the girl i’ve had scenes

were girls are totally naked in front of

totally naked and we’re like a tiny
there’s a little triangle they put over

the pubic region

that’s the only thing they have coverage
selves and when they do modesty triangle


called it’s called something every what
it’s called I have an amazing story

wonder if I can tell oh my god you can
do that and I i there’s a sexy

and we got were in Vegas so it by the
way somebody’s make a on over to our

house lies on the show but

I’ll I the last episode race pick up
upset about his heirs

there’s a girl that I have a bunch a
makeout scenes with she has a boyfriend

in real life she’s show sweets such a
great actress name is Valerie

curry and she was great in the scene 02

but she’s amazing cuz at the same time a
boy from Sunset sometimes hun said he


I’ll never for them %uh there was a
kissing scene is on Sep 4 other on of

week as we kiss

but like he he was so she is an actor
also so he knows going on a summer that

she’s like a pro an amazing she was
graded it there are some people are a

little bit more awkward about it there’s
some people that are not as

or like I remember there I did a short
someone said it was just

she she she had never done a kissing
scene before an HR matters

couples possible and everything and it
was his bet was just very weak you tell

a nervous she is and what I was guessing
they’re nervous a good feeling right

and so are my only feel that I’ve never
kissed a like a girl who’s at ease whole

release she’s always like

use wage where his own so like I I’m on
the end of the day

and it’s going alright as far as I’m
concerned for one great she’s

prime not feeling it and then at the end
that because I split the bill

allies say yeah it’s not matter in cases
where you SAT settle out to the car to

set my body and its allied

why do we get this out of the way now
because I feel like I don’t have the

first kiss later

do zebra and then she I can feel it the
hair on her backstage

she’s so disgusted by that right and
sheep tense is that like this

she alice is that pushing her shoulder
blades together in the back

like that so much it like a cat what
happens rather someone spilled hot water

down her back

%uh I don’t have you ever done with
airline is extrano have ever used a line

cuz my questions were observed the girl
doesn’t wanna make out with you

like I wanna see as they called for a
you’re talking actually is and I live in

real life lol

that’s actually line for many Hall it
worked in any hole alright radio except

that yes I get this over with yes I’m
going out over

have a razor no never course not a key
now def

I your table first cuz I

the event I V the developers the we do
Tuesday let’s kiss now before you know

me what happens if I don’t like you yell
be so great I this is my crazy story

where in Vegas there’s a scene where the
same ROM having sex is a it this is a

scene obviously

Ameritech to someone she does John she
does the sorrow show Dodgers I’m so

sorry another actors ever take some in
the same room

and the move the camera move is whatever
said this before

Richard side the camera moves is from

to the other person the wipe across the
room it’s a mi is a dick special thank

you guys actually fake

doing in the Cheetos they’ve completely
naked with the mouse issac on

so you see it as everything in the shot
also the other guy totally naked with a

mouse issac on

and they’re having sex with these two

gorgeous were by the way and I’m sex
with a beautiful woman as well

are but I am totally closed the joke was
as I said a total both

so I got to reporters same thing after
that a person and I was like a just so

you know

anything you like tell me what your cup
with a lot I feel comfortable and she

last year’s

I she goes yours baby listen to me I
miss softcore porn actress

you could do whatever you want Open Mic
and allied and she’s like

are you nervous down a whole lot of
other buyer if I heard by them

but a soft-core verses races of worries
there’s no penetration but they simulate


so there’s no actual penis or vagina but
it’s like it looks like there is

they’re on top each other alleged what’s
the plan that but because you can’t show

penetration Showtime HBO or like you

cinemax remember all those things are

out of it still exist other so much
bored I wonder if it does but I’m so

so I was like other okay very nice woman

she is another two is ed okay very nice
very nice woman

but very nice summer yes and it was

a swedish girl those a Swedish woman she
was the sweetest girl that she dies

readers from that kinda

a tolling ish I this beautiful a black

and then there is a forget what I’ll
Asian woman was we had like

was the pic all different ethnicity UN
who is great as the UN above software

part of my

we were in Vegas in a playset head
window seat windows that we were to have


the two people at 6am against the window
so essentially if you were looking in

that day

you would look like dodge because I
prefer you got a girl

because the cameras are behind yeah so
the camera move is this

I love this is too graphic check and her
family were scissors

as I molitor number I guess I love it do
you get the

simpson script that I gave it your
family yes did you use my father and I

texted you

I did I did give you a great you want it
to my day

and i cant im had texted you and said he
loved it pack initially happy he does I

get I’m happy that I could talk to a
fire at the Villa sex right at a

made a Hello Kitty handle your money

I so the move is cheeto this other guy

and then to me and i’m having sex with
this woman on a chair

and the whole idea is she’s on her back
commitment as well as a graphic

apologize but if you watch episodes in a

and when the camera comes to me up to
flipper sore head is

over the top in the chair and I’m DEF
sector from behind okay

K and she goes before hand she’s totally
naked off the bat

and she didn’t want to wear the little
piece that covers she’s like everybody

see me and I was like

as I all hours to close it didn’t matter
for me

and I was supposed to dislike pretend to
have sex then when europe James likes to

someone and you were in the pouch like
you’re wearing only underwear

it’s really hard be it’s really scary
and hard because I caught him so hard to

not get excited but when you’re fully
clothed a little bit easier for a

hundred different

so um so the first take she’s like you
do anything you want no worry

I’ll I minister Roberto

and so it goes because they go at where
do the first 12 guys don’t have to

pretend have sex on

so its cheered up the camera is cheeto

the whole areas is with his denim party
knows that word is all happening so

chill the other guy I see the camera
coming and what I’m

in the me Tom kind in the background and
she is acting like

hercules is fuckin like you

and so like I had to catch up my my
ferocious Nyssa my sex

to beat the levels are over actual what
she was throwing out there

bozo finally Heather the camera was on
us and so I flipped her over and she was

such a pro that I just like the movie is
so sexy and cool here

and then I’m just her from behind and
she’s so gorgeous is beautiful black

woman from me and

II taker Hannah pull her hair as
sometimes men do whether having sex

women from behind and she’s wearing a

the and though we’ve got from

and I put of her editors pulled over 100
of so her hair was to the left side of

her hair

and she did not break and she was acting
like Thor himself fucking her with the


after the no and her hair was barely
hanging on

edge is trying to fix your hair while
having sex the and I would they finished

listening to go cut

and she cracks up she lashed out like
hours ago it should kill me

she left such as I go I shoulda said you
do anything but touch my hair

a house like I am our policy I was so
jewish retirement today as I

I’m so sorry I was so sorry guys shave
really apologize sure they would that

take as a joke

are exists somewhere but they do not use
that it would appear that was a cabal

Blood Season 2 Vegas here free up

and literally happens where they changed
it to I’m having sex the guys I’m 6x

mean we high fived

which is so stupid whereby they can I
say there’s a scene if anybody ever see

that episode November up certain

the scene right after that the three of
us are hungover me to know and this

discovered a biz with are all hungover
eating brunch it in

awesome see and I remember channel I be
like that was a good one man here

and anytime she liked by Viva the
headset like that was better than shitty

yeah like decade as good other call baby

good idea note or a lot detail Hotel for
Dogs are allowed edition he was in Hotel

for Dogs well below it a real enough to
not only with

yet to autos when they ask you to do
stuff that looks so

cringe-worthy like high-fiving while
having sex yeah do you ever like

now say I don’t think that will happen
but this were both hammered

and it was me and my characters reduce
failed time and it was

literally the other guy’s last name is a
douche Diskin

yes over there called the douchebag to
end so that sounds like it was perfect

my character would do it for his
character because he wanted so bad what

a high five so bad and I his business

yeah that of course yeah same reason why
would on sex the same room there’s no

reason to we want to close the deal

yeah so that’s why we all did yeah that
are you close the deal

I all but that is my thats the funny sex
story about

that’s good so everybody is real sex
story share okay so

heli I think that several hundred I no
one else is in their hotels near there

about checking of the different types a

at him soft-core himself koran got off
to as I have to plan avails acquired I

I I’ll the choice for by the way it
happened %uh there’s a great

there’s a great beginning a sexy in this
year between me and valorie curry which

is so sweet and lovely in like

I feel I can incomes as well like
sections or what’s

like fun if you like the person sex /a
can be like a starter stuff like that

reich laughing and having fun it’s kinda
cute and sexy in

to her lap later having sex for real
less on your plate not like a lot like a

lap at the beginning when you’re kissing
someone like

stuff like that for those actual
penetration yeah I now own 1 I’m

one arm I having set will like Jake
around as when you have sexy single

The Lion King theme at the beginning I

the 10-year yeah

the lab operating yeah I don’t know
about you now

iPad Yahoo oooh iight

writer right that it had been the

have a data have main event data have a
data have been up with very first

by Rahat a commercial yeah

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commercial we’ll be right back with a


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you hear advertisers giving up promo

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and online codes on coupons are great
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please I’m begging you you text

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yeah I’d be down to sponsor them again a

so you get you give your able to redeem
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whenever you’re checking out it’s that
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let’s get back to the episode i right

we’re back and miss you yeah the makeup
sexual or ready to buy such a shock

a what I just realize you probably
didn’t give this guy bytes

we just talked about our okay up this is
the I told them to break up with this


know it’s a terrible about oceana I

as a bad boyfriend not this reality you
got it you have to learn that is a part

of her job unfortunately that’s
something you have to deal with

also you have to you have to understand
that you might be a little bit jealous

but it’s an jealousy that comes from
something that makes sense that a

Chelsea like

all the guy who she’s out who she at
tonight’s literally but because for the


a very attractive guy probably yeah

night so I understand it a read
something it is going to be to you

she is nervous about it as well she’s
more nervous about the new order it’s

our first time kissing someone on camera
or on stage

be as supportive as you can you could be
like a you know what this makes me feel

uncomfortable but

I’m supportive love you please whatever
a if you’d like a renewed air show the

the EU got up hope

in cross your fingers that it’s fine the
other thing is you’re so young

you’re 21 years old and 18 you’re a team
at the rally

he was going to college oh wow so arm

breakup no not break act like your
co-star you see as China’s but by Tom

it is something you can make her feel
bad for to make her feel shame she’s

just nervous as you are

letter letter do our thing and be
supportive arm if it’s a live show

I would show up to a live show in
support her if it’s on whenever kick

that do that after

that sucks man Green Giant yeah and by

that guy is girlfriend you know her
stage partner

tammy and jake and Jake Jake Jake what I
get home got Jake your

rhythm sorry again very yet

gimme a jkjkjkjkjk one another

with a rep at the brothers I don’t know
when I’m wrong and they’re just you know

where to start

Garia jkjkjkjk wanna Jake Jake in a JJ
Jake edge

I am at a loss that cool how do you play
guitar we can do that makes no sense

or guitar doesn’t catharsis like steady
all the time like 10 a no it’s not

data I don’t know I don’t know I idly
attack israeli Qatar

lady is mom SAT I

ever given your phone number out

on this podcast now nurse or like a old
school hip-hop the medulla

I really give a run for around a third
done does on his album

somebody although he does not yeah gives
his actual photos noises yes somebody

else did before him a hearing

who was and said what call me yeah

I podría is like no ever

hardliners like you think I’m not you
that you say you can’t get in touch with


like whatever and then he just says
number I called it it’s a 555

know it I mean I think another i think
is a real number

had to ask questions when I other my
guest already in how to ask questions

like how to get people to ask questions
no you can’t you people can email

if I research team at a company here but
that’s another question all right we got

time for one last light through

as to give the poor the show is of
course you do

you just you just did had that was the
point so you just gave this guy

that is both I give good advice idea to
break up

like this so young yeah Rams have that
severely love the tiebreaker


you could stick it out and I mean if the
jealousies indeed too much for you to

handle then

then you don’t know maker ya deals go
through it once he got there I got

better at it

I’ll age not every seems that we getting
a head start

it’s not as big a deal she’s picking out
to be it does suck though I he really

feel for you

a are at one last question one last time
online time just

denied a mailman a.m. yaa mailman know
about this

about taking where they love to dance
yell Joanna podcast I guess we talk

about going out dancing they go out
dancing and it is something

it is a joy that I forgot that I had

Amir and Jake and Amir had push me to go
out dancing couple times we had a blast

to their death inspired by the way where
we’ve got up many times only bad part is

that kinda ruins regular Barska then
it’s like oh what am I doing here

there’s no well as the to be fair we
don’t go to clubs on his one-time with

turbo an hour I would ever like a techno

my own ID DM no I mean by the way but
more power too nice a doctor who love

the community around but

II love have Upper Darby I would love to
those have played his love hip-hop bars

with those little it’s a cop Grey’s
Anatomy all that I know Samantha right

about that show in Fairfax every now and
then I was like we gotta go to that

its people dancing to the best she so
good but then why are there not more are

hip-hop barbie Los Angeles

and I now but check found one that every
Saturday night ok maybe that’s okay

Saturday really your my friends weddings
this weekend

I’m also going with this week I get back

I a alright

ready the guys name I

sure the this guy is brought to you by
Energizer batteries

ok his David israel’s but the

I’ll his


is LaFrance that L a RR

ENT in LaFrance or dollar goals

well the jewish know is our Irish

now a delegate any Leyritz whenever
videos Yahoo if

ghouls is it a go like a ghost yes I was
norris et ghouls anymore

spiegel do I’ll say girl every day if it
was my favorite line your day going to


what’s that for the prior to carry intro
do it I’ll

the one do it for the trailer the let
you best there but the added you I’m

edited though

taking a liner that other like a regular

a opinions are like assholes Jake

yeah Carolina and was worth it

I as all I

you may ask is are doing to present a
real and but after the %uh that’s not


I a clarence write

Menomena leg denim day go by where a
bubble as other time like a giant

carbonated so

should I change your them Sood Acer oda

a speedup as other little run said in
their honor thy

the SB is Naveen dinner SBA varieties

to well I a L %uh to

was alright to rate thanks guess

pagado I

I hey guys broke up with the girlfriend
of three years a couple months agobig

serious about joining tenders legends
classic Setra

for a while but was worried about
running into the axe on there how long

should I wait

before getting these aP’s have you ever
run across an axe on

tender best LaFrance

as either a low dollar cool

I am and another see as a dancer but I
can’t give you general sweeps

because both on dinner yeah go to top it
on the back est

yeah by your dinner we did you make
above poster visitor profile

did can have so funny I month by the way

he may not know but Jake is very funny
president of the short films his

fandom I but it’s so bad about another
jacket for the compliment you probably

don’t know it because I could perform
his lackluster his writing is poor

but is actually if the had a threat is
for but he’s really

but not limited by bennett et I I like
the things he says it does but just like

the mistakes he made yesterday to Davis
Odom yeah

Matt Besser once said that a a great
straight man is one of the hardest

things in the universe to find you have
to be so good and so funny to pull it


data is the only thing harder than that
is to be like the funny silly wacky I

I that’s the cake people wanna laugh at
that without Jake you make no sense

the threat but that to realize when I do
short attire free

for you meet about the crazy the same
time be here that’s just too much

well what about also when we at Thomas
and you and me a

NJ killers a fucking Chappel on a big
girl yeah

%uh the I will say it was my favorite
things I watch a community in quite a


is when Jake brake because he gives you
what you

we give you the character any breaks it
by going like when he tries he to

Freddie are too cool

I A go nuts for that character Jake
there is one where like

them and at times ripe amanda Bynes is
phone number ni like

turns elisa even tell me ahead and in
with by since

that I yeah there’s three very though
there’s that Jake

there’s the Jake where arm bike

of what we just did 100 in that episode
in episode 10

the two-party got the better but he’s
trying to do

what he’s trying to do the better
memories do those impressions but

they’re gonna be deleted scenes

yeah we should be that way about 20 but
man he was making us laugh because he

commits so he wants to people i think is

to its opening the second there’s a
shred have doubt

that someone doesn’t think he’s cool he
put on he tries

harder than a mere size and daddy you
day and night they would Alyssa after

it’s really really funny I think there’s
a jaded what Jake is I think that with

the a real one is probably the most
crazy right

through but it was it was a parking is
crazy Russian doing and we’re never

going to Chick Corea

me that said he talkin about guest I
feel nothing

really feel you only gonna lead JJ
motions we think dick

I’m really sad there were several este
año said

yeah I think when we like we’re in we’re
reading you

felt like and I’ll a hazard hours
working on it and then

at the end of that long day when I like
that the rap and then it was like

there was little there was every chance
we would never see each other again but

like that but I will a word like taking
over said

borrow the end to that thing so would
feel like sad remember that yeah

know what he is like why you doing its
when you hug me

yet though or like be like a this was so
fun like I wanted to be genuine


I was a real moment that we like snuck
into the video yeah I did that by the

way the into parts record that is well
known geologic now a partner at yeah

that you have read it I am at the end of
it wanna lines was

arm hey Leslie and she turned around to
go I’ve always loved you

and I did it as sincere as possible I
wanted to be like

for the first time you see what he
really thinks I’m what is like why he’s

been trying so hard the whole time

has he really loves Leslie like he’s in
love with her and

if you watch it it’s like gyro was cryin
summer takes

well is legit I try to make a genuine
and also I think it makes it

so funny that is that whatever

and also they did the funniest edit were
after it when she goes i kno

I get up in like I get up yeah

is whatever bad hezbollah at the and
their black-out a commercial right after

its it may be left so hard but one
thing’s wishing that Jake and Amir

just so we could like I like when it
airs again the parks and the Adam

you guys in those on things like it’s
like be the facilities were to myself in

a most fun

arm you guys without me knowing iraq has

they’re very they’re very nice initially
edits each at it and I get to you know

to rough cut I don’t know if you do have
other guys but

no very very nice you and that the right
together we can do the process together

we go back Tom and they’re very very
good reading but they added that montage

I had no idea there was a montage

in the final one Arnold outtakes enemy I
knew something was special

with the copy because amir never emailed
me more though appeared like a there’s a

new cutaway think

but that he like texting me know we
won’t have my pay check it out I

they are working I they killed by day’s
special treat in this alone I gotta osha

I got close to a teary-eyed when I wash
it was because it was like

my country doing it for this long yeah

and it was all others yet Allah made me
emotional relief to complete those

really old clips

like holy shit so crazy and the best for
their from the outtakes are from like

the fight was like for us being us

yeah and laughing for real that was as
being us laughing for real

and then you doing your fixie laugh at
me not being able to the

control the soca i’m for the first time
I did you guys rode nervous for sorry

you’re nervous the first two times

I could tell you were nervous like play
as we never

we are eased up with a real continue
exploring how is it that makes me

nervous know you’re so comfortable now

up to think about the last we did were
you do those fuckin and added that the

best part was

let them like jay and Ava there and
added that damn

and I did that and made a big ball back
to that with you guys

don’t know that now is oregano are

diego’s baths I and I’ll say daniel

looking about the no I’m saying no arm

to permit a just lately with the real
life ban I’ve never ever done that


I X I was a crazy can always insane I
was there a rather

a I was really offers absurd and also
the car remember that one that we did

where you did the cart man

and yeah I was there they are origin at
like my

the bad over depressions those like me
Batman shit man that may be left shows

back Matt though I the baby laugh

so orkut and then your and then you had
like some beetlejuice are some weird

little you’re a Christian Bailey

you’re gonna love my like Batman yeah a
bit like a bad weather here too

away there was something that and yes it
is watch the video I just that

gel but Jake is incredibly funny Amir
gets a lot of credit and Jake is

incredibly funny

a.m. I am really funny everybody love
you dad your mom Latino

I have my mother’s knee and we’re going
to continue to collaborate don’t know

how all we know we’re gonna start to
write stuff

for fun see if it even applauds the by

for fun in cash II me we’ll see about
the cash but regardless it’ll be fun no

one will be fine with her rich

many years is problem I’m rich with less
product you know the whole lot

yeah what got it average day I

is where I get it down I’m bridged jaan

averaged a leather 45 minutes as

let’s talk to this guy really quickly on
the phone yep a trade away as a question

yeah Isaac

can I join tendered to have to wait okay
elementary II your dinner

dead and it does matter is the actual
just like a left its okay or I’d like

the fact the CRX means that she’s on it

your social media get mad at you also be
slowed her left she’d

there’s a good chance if you see her
first if you Swiper left there’s a good

chance that you want to show up in her

cue is it also find to start like do you
give yourself like a oh I just broke up

I better take a week off

as from Ras I just know I wanna go into
normally after but he said his month


yeah thats under present by now I would
die by the way I’m also the

nature I would anybody for a little bit
out of summer meant something to you

ray I respect our table time I don’t
think Jake is the same way wheeling I

was not trying to date anybody and I
just want something that wasn’t serious

I would immediately go to tender

that’s where you get that stuff D me
you’d even try not to bone a girl

I yeah when I my mom weirdo that
something like that you know I’d like to

hear about someone comes out because I
felt like

if i were now the girl no actually loved
her really cared about her

and then I found out three days after we
broke up shit sexually guy like are

that’s just

stats Tara just makes me feel disgusting
see you wouldn’t do that is why I way to

live a little bit yeah


that’s very thoughtful love you I
usually like to wait to at least like

three or four weeks before we break up

ol I’ll

I just wanted to know how big my dude
this episode is so much better than the

first one yeah

virgil was so boring this phone is so
much better a they talked about sex

instead runs there’s only one thing they
can make a better on that I get up our

Hugo the thank you ban for credit

yeah we a week everybody s on the air
for about an hour

we if you have your own questions on
themes something missions

send em on down to if I were you show

at gmail dot com bend you have anything
you wanna plug

I do by the way I am i allowed to plug
something and i cant say whatever you

want for real

yeah are there some other means a lot
lied about okay feedback from but

I i would like to do I’ll a

our way when is gonna as sometime in the
next couple weeks

March Ohaus liza be wrapping up guys I

give house lies a shot this year my Ross
on these

the writers Jamey these amazing arcan
and his beautiful dramatic beats its


as you watch the season my brother says
he loves it now it’s so

this season is I mean it that all this
is a great but this season there

I mean we just the characters are
separable know they are now we get to

really play like i’ve a father

though the craziest thing that’s ever
happened in any TV show ever done

happens in the next three weeks lolol

by like a crazy story line and also
there’s like

a those sections we talk about how you
get to see like sparks had people alike

which I played out there’s

more than two people involved in this
thing and it’s it’s fun but I am

I get these really great words that
these writers Rob me and our metonomy

hell about my character

with an example when a group of my puppy
smiles a 2-2 tie by you say that

yeah but there’s one great one a really

%ah but there there is i

it’s a really good season give it a shot
on Showtime 10 p.m. Sundays and go on

Showtime anytime you watch every single

episode watch House allies in Prospect
side is on there undermanned

I acker check your stock up on me
interject jokes and that’s it

being you wanna do not resign because he
said you were going to do when after

take that as a good

I will give the guitar to mir I’ll as

you can play more than four seconds

pan two lawyers will be on our always up
dinner plate art

kind of oh my god this amazing

just die hard from a for the Wizards on

yeah already you play with it I was
named the word

though we’re first turned you know that
the high part from Buddy Holly

which I’ll %uh school

bro up

at school regular size room


she’s a JA ger

old crazy about day

and noms enemy


likes colorful socks too


she’s a free the good

our to change a canopy

here have a3 a saddam

but Beca to

I’m cuz I know


in free

Obama he my thank you guys a buyer you

thank you for having me on never see you
again I got router

everybody I don’t know if you’ve heard
but your paper website China dot com now

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