Episode 186: Polyamory (w/Elliott Morgan!)

Comedian/Actor/Writer/Host Elliott Morgan is in the house to discuss butts, crushes, and love triangles.

This episode is brought to you by BeekeepersNaturals, BirkSun, andThrowBoy.com!

this is a gumiho new episode of if I were you November 30th and we’ve got three new sponsors wow that’s a fun little episode you get my god it’s you know it’s new because everything about it is brand new also Jakes not even in this episode yeah I said fuckit that was a new thing for me to try out my new attitude a bad one poorly before we get to any of that let’s thank our first new sponsor and were talking about bee keepers Naturals dot com tell me what’s this all about be yeah anyway beekeepers Naturals dot com is a sustainably sourced all natural health product website and they got this propolis propolis proposed US pro proposed was the Rapala spray that’s a great source of antioxidants for the maintenance of good health or talking about sore throat relief antibacterial antiviral kegger sore relief antifungal antibiotic its health and a spring and it’s completely natural and you sprayed in your throat and it not only is good for you but it tastes good at the same time I often do like the products that bees make for me and yeah I E honey yeah we were talking about this last week how bees live to serve their human overlords of course and this is just another example it’s almost perfectly timed it we could have had it the medically be episode but now we just have a dramatically be podcast podcast is be related the spray contains only three ingredients it’s completely natural it comes in a convenient and easy to use spray bottle that fits in your pocket or purse and right now if you use our coupon code which is Jake or amir is Jake you get 10% off your order so check them out this isn’t a huge corporation these are at this is this is a nice little small company that’s trying out podcast advertising for the first time there be people yeah we can all agree that is like them this is at Walmart here so if you’re near a computer it would it would help them out help us out by going to beekeepers Naturals dot com that’s beekeepers Naturals dot com bee keepers Naturals that’s right both plural they also have an Instagram handle beekeepers underscore Naturals if you wanna see photos of this thing in action you know we have a lot of singers musicians that do theme songs and what we’re about to go on to her we may need this 1845 that’s right we have to keep our voice healthy and you know we do sing a lot on tour so we have to use our way to keep the boys healthy and people that use their voice a lot just like us little treat any scratchy inflammation in the throat so one last time you’re covered in open source I do yes I have in my mouth is actually an open sore I was without a hole in my face and i got a canker sore and it opened up and look at this it’s just us no teeth just dripping globs on your guns so don’t be like me how beekeepers Naturals dot com thanks guys for sponsoring this episode thanks for listening to this episode jack mentioned earlier we do have a new guest elliott Morgan was in the house you know from his work on the youtubes and if not you’re just going to join for the first time ever right now let’s get started things did get real indeed we are on tour this week we should mention if you’re listening to this and you’re near San Francisco Portland Seattle or Vancouver we’re just driving up the coast on Wednesday Friday Saturday Sunday tickets still available all that if I ryushare.com but for now let’s start this podcast enjoy ya I got it I gotta how many rides are unwrapped his name was David Daigle turning me on is from French Canada but its artists name his artist name is more neo is also hard to say they are and I a page on Facebook Twitter SoundCloud you know where it is morally all morning Elliott Morgan ok but I’m not that correctly I make type beats as well as this year that was you were taking a shower and in my sink the public in my bedroom you can take all the showers you want my sink with a dry dry cuba so brushing up against your armpit hair sorry about that bad picture but how would our fans know you or even if they don’t want to explain what human beings are recognized on the street they say oh you’re that guy yeah I’ve gotten recognized mostly from sources which is a YouTube news comedy channel YouTube news comedy channel yeah that started back in 2012 I did that life was so much better than not 2012 yeah this was pre all that shit yeah forget everything you know about 2014 ABC and ADC 2013 and then now I do stand up and I do I host for a show called you often get credit for is a show called misconceptions on a channel called Mental Floss where tell people how they’re wrong about everything and I host for lives in battle some stuff with Mashable easy just all over the internet on my co-host ya got the most for the internet the hostess with the mostess taken I also made a living online so I feel like I’ve been orbiting the same univers never actually like Adams yeah yeah yeah a nucleus and an electron never actually we’re just constantly this is actually the Higgs boson are both smart if the big more than I could ever are you smart I don’t think so no I think I is usually what people say you know what I think I have learnt this my therapist told me I don’t have intuitive street-smart maybe streets like the street smart way to do it and i think thats I am intuitive and street smart and I’m actually really tough and I’m very good thing about me tells me no I don’t think I’m not as well read it I don’t have a lot of books in our studio but I i I personally don’t read as much as eight should you know what happens is that I get to a book and if it’s bad it slows me down and I never stopped reading it and I never pick up another book that is the problem is your book finisher yeah I know I have started a new book I’ve had a half-finished read biography of the Wright brothers on my back on my nightstand for like five months and I just can’t find the energy to lift it up and hear and read more about how they fucking went back and forth from kitty hawk trying to test flights didn’t work they go back to Ohio then the next summer they go back to the beginning of flight is one of the most interesting things about halfway done with the book and just I’m so bored I don’t care about planes ya know what will happen though eventually figure it out yeah that’s like a biography thing literally about about and why they so rarely work the inherently by the subject yet doesn’t know itself well enough to talk on it objective is to be so fucking interesting right because I usually don’t like a couple of interesting things but with every part of you have ever read it’s like they just try to make this stretch everything you know the most bored like high school hundred pages yeah we don’t need that you know the real problem is we just saw Hamilton and now like what am I supposed to do read a book everything should be made into a wreck if everything can be made into like a rap hiphop bruh I’d be down to watch do a lot with the Wright brothers yeah what the Wright brothers or maybe rhymes with flight and like the rest right that’s happening so crazy well you can add to your list of good quality I can wrap and Broadway instead of a biography Jake and I’ll just have a collection of podcasts where we’re just venting about what we think about things and I don’t know if you’ve ever listen to the show but this program is actually called if I were you and it’s an advice podcast basically the only advice podcast on the internet that Jake and I host ok and usually it’s just heard of another would usually just us to giving advice and sometimes we have gas friends family and all of those yeah and my brother and Jake’s brother so if you want if you can do you mind trying to answer some advice questions with us for the next let’s say 39 minutes as always these are real emails from real people we give them big names there anybody can you give me the name of a lady Jessica Jessica did you make that up I just kind of threw themselves they never heard that it sounds like it’s not spelled in the way that you think the ROI rights I’ve been in a relationship with a girl for about four months now and when we first got together she mentioned that she preferred polyamorous relationships we agreed to talk about it properly if one of us developed feelings for somebody else but I was hoping that would never happen but she told me yesterday that she has a big crush on a boy she works with and isn’t sure how to address it it makes me really sad and anxious thinking about her dating someone else but it makes me feel worse to imagine not being with her should I act cool and give polyamory a try or try to compromise with her or just cut and run please help of Jessica alright I’m excited about this on the phone calls she’s gay the coolest you can see her girlfriend is even cooler cuz she’s by which is even so much cooler than just straight discussed if they get what’s the point I feel like they’re doing it so that’s why I’m gay now I love what’s your relationship history by the way so I can I can understand your monogamous married in august 20 what you got married at age 28 2010 in college we were mad get out why did that why did you how did you when did you we got it was we got married in July of 2007 I don’t care what it was a beautiful wet with sports were high school sweethearts wow we got had you know relationship and then we got engaged and married yes we also have this is a fun fact that people usually find fun I’m over tired i cant way but we have the same birthday day and year that is cool and we have the same mom and dad was born in the same city hospitals and mom no yeah we were born different cities different cities same same date same day in like less I grew up in central florida we wound up meeting in a high school when we are 14 so this is your first lady basically everything and so I am completely able to talk as an authority I know good group of people who you know identify with that sort of lifestyle I think it’s very interesting you have other people who are very against it and the people were not everybody’s cut out for it but there’s nothing that’s great about another’s bad about it just like you know what I a way to be but this girl clearly can’t be Polym now she’s like I was hoping it would never come up polyamory that’s cool that’s never happened yeah it sounds cool can you get the hook up with other people but then you realize it’s actually just other your loved one hooking up with other players also playing it cool when you’re already this anxious and it’s also like you’re not be like the mentality of it as I have somebody comes to you and I like ok well I said I was polymerized which is good and then they try to act on it the other person feels like they don’t have validation and they’re like attachments that person because they feel like they have to like you know that sort of thing but it’s like she’s you know ok cool I love that cause I like you find somebody with that she’s going to be like sad by yourself yeah that’s not what if your wife broach that topic to you it should be like hell no like this one it was at least set up yeah I just wanna fuck your wife is now that’s my phone’s ringing if my wife came in now instant that hadn’t been previously discussed yeah I know I’m just saying in general you wouldn’t be down now because I think here’s the thing I think that there is a the polyamory think I think sometimes you can put certain labels on things makes it sound maybe a little bit cooler than it actually is in practice every single word it is super cool and it’s like you can you know exactly what it is well yeah like I get to have a lot of threesomes yeah I know people who likes it there polyamorous and they believe that they’re like they have so much love and it’s so much that it can’t be just simply for one person yeah I think it’s a nice I don’t really know how that works but maybe I’m just like barely amorous at all so you’re not amorous I have no memory of remember Allah would you ever be down to be polyamorous it sounds like it’s right up your alley yeah I think the complex thing is just like sticking to your guns when you start to have feelings for someone like polyamory that’s just that’s always just like base level for me like I want to fuck a bunch of people sure I would you define that as a Marine yeah that’s what it is probably less wow yeah like I don’t want to be in a relationship we had talked about other people that’s all great but as soon as you start to really like somebody you know what do you do for me as soon as I start to like really like somebody like whoa wait a second yeah this is just between us how do you how do you get to Lake you want to start hooking up with somebody else do you really like the original person unless you don’t like the original person see how I feel like there’s maybe I’m wrong and I’m usually am but Murray it would be like you’re literally like in love with two people in love like being single polyamory is like it is a relationship between like multiple people but those people are in their relationship so would you like us to reach our other roommate Marty right of us are just fucking each other and we’re all in a relationship and that’s pretty good cause we can all like the interchangeable equality I think the inherent problem with polyamory is like what if one time I come home from work and you guys are all fucking and it’s just like how you guys do you prefer fucking without me so it’s a movie and your home and it’s like wait a second why don’t you like it’s almost worth because you and your group of friends like no one’s laughing at my jokes in everybody’s life in another person’s Joe call now because everyone loves my jokes but actually very race not be worthy to other people right it’s like imagine that being so heightened because the people you think are interested in you are the people that are like your two boyfriends and girlfriends or whatever yeah yeah so there’s a difference between an open relationship and polyamory polyamory is like a group of three people constantly hanging out in open relationship with you but Alice a habit that’s when I super chick police check their main piece by piece market wrap-up Boston Market I love it Florida and they got it and barbaric though really nice and it’s really wide streets strip malls in Boston Market rotisserie chicken gas station parade just clean shells just a nice she’ll like a show yeah you know it’s a little too close for my taste anything with Techron a chevron is good 75 prefer places that have had huge spills so an Exxon Valdez Europe yeah I’d like to support them jaded history I like the tarnished past I like the idea of when I’m filling up my tank to imagine historic just covered in black gasoline yeah yeah she’s my emblem she is the emblem of me is 2 p.m. for your Mazda know the stork but why but why like if I had a lady friend and she went mini golfing with someone like that’s ok but why is it so much worse if she kisses somebody like when you hug somebody you have more physical contact then if you kiss Bill Wyatt why would it make me angry to see her kiss somebody what is that about i mean but where does that jealousy come from I believe that there is certainly more of an intimacy with the kissing yeah how many people you would play many people you would let inside of your body so by bless you understand you can like comprehend like ok you can get dinner with somebody you play minigolf with somebody but then then they’re saying like they want to be penetrated by somebody say well that’s a very intimate thing that I thought you would only do with somebody you care about ya so you care about somebody else I think the real question is can you care about somebody else without diminishing the way you care for the person you are in love like could I love three people yeah I can’t I can’t even like date overlapping I have to like stop one and start the they’re a little unique I feel like the whole thing of polyamory is such a weird thing because it assumes like a very late cut-and-dried definition of love and then decides to multiply that love is and if love is simply wanting to have sex with people then like that’s a very basic definition and then you’re not really talking about true polyamory but if you love it a much deeper sense then love my daddy percent is when you don’t necessarily feel that way to stick with that person anyway then you know get over that home at least that’s what that’s worth it and I read in the pamphlets took you to the to the college before I think but polyamory is the worst of any of them really like monogamous relationship then you’ve got one person’s feelings that you have to consider and care about ya being single I guess it’s still one it’s like your self and I mean you should always be nice to people but you’re in like four relationships are they were like it’s not care for you too much stress why on earth would I want to have three girlfriends could all get a nap and they will they will start talking to other guys into this tribe here he had polygamy oh yeah that’s like if it’s a guy married to her or plural wives and not not reflect what about plural husband that’s not polygamy I guess what that exists for whites polygamy and polyamory good if it’s still something you would like more mins pulled polygamy like this sort of like have arranged marriage marriages arranged by the church and women are allowed to have sex with multiple men yeah that’s what I call this that’s a whole different kind of sort of the inequalities right polyamory I honestly don’t know the name alone it’s just like it sounds nice because it’s love for all you know which one gets the threesomes that back that question that’s probably right it’s amazing that’s what I want to be I think I just wanna be buff yeah but I really like if you lifted weights for three years you still wouldn’t be as good as goslings yeah I know I’ll be strong its crazy cuz its it helps to get girls if you’re strong it also helps if you’re hot and also helps if you’re famous and also talented and too talented to let to have all four meetings he can do whatever he wants just chooses what he wants but I wonder if it’s lonely at the top if there’s no sense in a calm voice from high school to you if everyone’s consulate there there’s no like this I get fucked up with her I i hooked up with everybody it’s not good anymore I mean he’s villages operating on a totally different caliber to you know like the game he’s playing the game the guys is playing the game the gods are playing God Ling and he is and that is true is that a Dr pun know it was just a Dr Lawrence Lawrence is that true terminated from one later that are you saying that’s true true I’m 100% Bill Lawrence worked for a named her after topanga canyon in his last night last name so I just put together and I don’t know I have never been this confused its advisors realize the Lauren thing exactly that totally made it now a weird thing to do is come on make up the most of the sterilized before Spin City it was started before I’m sure there is some overlap in the later years of women answer this question should I act cool and give polyamory try or herself you are you are one woman woman I should try it was the other alternative is leaving so you’re gonna it’s like hurt less to break up with her girlfriend right now then it will to watch her girlfriend fucking guy how is she trying polyamory she stays with a girl who’s polyamorous but she’s just not have as many loves for this one girl that one cutner on Curtner on take it out now so they get a ticket next question we need guys the job of the guests with Peter definitely P I T E R writes a few weeks ago I started high school so I thought I would get this girl to date or at least become better friends we’ve been friends for a few years and I have liked her since we first met most of the time in class she acts like she likes me however most of her other friends are in other classes and when we’re all together she basically ignores me almost one of my friends sorry anyway one of my friends decided to text her and tell her that I like ur afterwards she briefly texted about it but didn’t say too much the next day at school we were in the same classes and we SAT together anyway it was very awkward but she acted as if nothing had happened so when I got home I decided to text her and after who she likes she texted back saying she likes no 1 I’m really confused she doesn’t want to date anyone right now and I agree but at least I wanna know she likes me for the future I am a complete dating new and have never even considered having a girlfriend until now what do you think is there a chance that she’s into me who man high schools hard for it I am so sorry and i dont have texting now I get up and that instant messenger was the ship at 3:30 sign online you see those doors opening late night conversations about 2 a.m. doing papers like talking like nobody else is online except for one person you have like these really intense heart-to-heart that screen name that you’re really really hope with sign on and when they do it feels so fucking good and then you’re just like waiting like waiting waiting for them to IMU remember that affect the door is closing and opening closing was definitely there was your favorite a message I don’t remember I’ve gotta ask this i really think I had some different colors they got into it is good classic yeah you know I try to keep it and then there’s your profile their profiles that’s what I’m thinking your profile given away message that I like teasing percent and because it put that person’s name and it kind of sucks it good luck so nowadays kids are just all about that text instead of getting into a chat room kids these days they don’t know what they’re missing is the text on a computer and now you can text on a computer but it’s I guess it’s slightly different cause there’s no cherry actually basically a.m. with with your test three long as you just don’t have that personal contact just never look at you have ever had like a super intimate conversation and take the next day it was me that opened up to you about having a crush on you now have a test page 14 like this led to actual marriage ya tell you they were in ninth grade is your soulmate forever if you go back and you watch the great romantic films of Ages profile quote about that see you mary ann was that the person you like things on my mind the most yeah you imagine being married to that person right now I’m still friends with her wow you killed her oh yeah did you relationship instantly at age 14 and ended up crush honor ya later on later on crush and then you dated in college high school and college same college do long distance for four years ago incidentally the same college as chose it because we were lovers as basically we’d both been planning to go to the same college which is what the University of Florida Gators Florida Gators yeah dude I’ll Joakim Noah yeah I mean I don’t know are you friends of Tim Tebow best is a dude actually no not besties but I could go on for a long time graduated in the same ceremony and he they for some reason let him sit on stage and whatever I’m not better about it now Tim Tebow looks Lake kinda like you if you take steroids throughout University I’m not joking you that might be the nicest thing anyone my wife and now that pales in comparison I’m catching that I look like oh we look at the worst version of it was just still hotter than 99% of this high school there is little confused it’s clear it up she doesn’t like you yes you asked point-blank which is a fun exciting texts indeed he said who like you like you can get it opens up the door to that body tour playing devil’s advocate sure maybe ok she has a girl doesn’t want to be the first to say that she likes him he has yet to say I like you would only be in secondhand friend open door but she’s only nice to him in the one class where they don’t have any other friends that’s a definite pendant like every other all the rest of it and I double advocate has been shut down the weather turned up the pipe I mean shit yeah I think if somebody doesn’t say these are high schools in ninth grade on this this is the beginning of what day is now it’s like everyone is so polite that nobody’s saying like I don’t like you know everything like no I’m not gonna like she’s saying I don’t think anybody and she’s hoping that he takes the hit and like think about when somebody asks you out you wanna go you don’t say no I don’t want to date you you say I can’t this week I’m busy next week I’ll let you know when it will happen but I’m missing like who do you like it’s like a fun way of saying who you have a crush on yeah I mean that’s true but I’m just saying like the scope of like actual dating right now a non responses it is in no right now just because of how nice and like nine additional how appellate everybody is yeah which is not exactly where the younger generation is known for great but it’s weird how the person they become very very passive and not wanting to step on anybody’s toes but then again I don’t feel weird no wonder mean internet comment success there probably so pent up in like filled up with like actually motions and like animosity that they can be mean to each other everybody knows what they are doing to each other but it that’s the question like that who do you like it was like it’s me presuming that I know everybody that you know everybody’s just hang out at school right you know fifteen people who do you like those 15 and that’s dating anybody yeah what’s her deal how do I know her but I like what highschool did you go to which is weird people still ask me that about who I’m dating and like I’ve only dated two high schoolers and said 1030 so it’s not even like a huge thing that’s great keep it under one with a teacher yea even average and normal 21 year old person you are smart was not an accurate enough to know that already + 30 + 1221 man you got it and this guy is there any chance that she’s into me I would say probably not and I would say if you have doubts are you want to know ask her or at least say you like her but he’s like do you like anybody she says no you like me now he wants just begun writing a gentle its brand said this guy likes you if she liked you then then it would have happened and then he said then you have the courage to say who do you like and she dodged you like asking you’re right I’m the kids a loving relationship happily married for eight years each other and women you know how many to our podcast at age 19 we would have made fun of you what are you doing you’re getting married and I think I wanna marry her teenager man you don’t get love you don’t know what true love is and I you still married and doing great I’m dick I have no dick I didn’t have to worry about STDs yeah that’s pretty nice I skipped a whole shit you skip text flirting you skip tendering you skipped 02 ever feel I did on YouTube but it is tender and I literally my bios like I’m doing this is a joke yeah and I did like five episodes on my YouTube channel and I would just get on there and I would not look at it I would swipe rate on everything just to see what happened and I literally the BIOS I don’t take it seriously and it still got people I mean every now and then just getting that’s a dangerous experiment at like I just basically just come the world seeing who would fuck me and I just wasn’t reading it was just like wow there’s so much as a weird it’s basically do you like me it’s do you like me the app like based off of this year based on earth three inch by three inch image all I could ever need they do there’s something to that the gut reaction decision the instant attraction of you blindly swiping rate for four and a half hours just what’s it called when you fish but with a net dragging across the ocean yet all right let’s take a quick break and we’ll be right back with a little bit more Morgan and Jake promised you more new sponsors were giving you more news sponsors think you as well to Berk son BIR KS UN dot com for sponsoring this episode what do they do a website is pretty neat it’s pretty convenient and it’s pretty awesome and I’m talking about a backpack will have its website they got a backpack now do you believe the ad let’s do the next we actually do work son dot com has backpacks with solar panels on them so you can charge your shit on the go that actually is truly awesome it sounds like a smart idea from 20 vision but it they actually went through made it into a business for everybody there’s no chance in hell that simple smart really easy to execute for music festivals or hiking or traveling are you going to the beach skiing snowboarding you have a backpack on you that actually will charge your phone and it still looks kinda cool like the solar panel is not like a weird-looking things they integrated into the design it’s an awesome thing to get for yourself and it’s especially great let’s mention on Cyber Monday that we is a great gift for the holiday season the coming up I am going to buy my brother one actually actually since if you do get one on 1130 that is Cyber Monday they’re doing a buy one give one with a charity called solar sisters by 11 I might not do that I don’t want to give to charity by accident what the hell is wrong with you I don’t know if I give to charity I’m gonna do it as a tax write off losses you’re such a bad attitude Man two to three minutes in the Sun gives you a 1% charging your phone that’s about half the speed of the wall for charging it’s waterproof and you can basically smart charger smartphones your GoPro as many speakers and other small devices you’re traveling with electricity that you harness from the Sun super humid imagine having gone to music festival and having a charger on your backpack that’s the way I mean that’s the worst part about going to those festivals are going on a long camping trip like keeping there was a time and I will turn my car is like a charge my phone in the car charger and then I shut the door and I had locked the keys in their car was just sort of like sitting there pretty stressful time so I would have a void stressful times check out the check out their products at the very least let’s send them some traffic that’s Burke son BIR K as you dot com solar panel backpacks great for charging your shirt on the go thanks Burke Sanford trusting us to deliver that message to our fans thank you as well to throw boy dot com 3000 that’s right the room boy the creator of the original emoji hello I have two nieces and i cant say I can’t stress how much these little girls love their fucking emoji pillows did you get them those yes you probably sent us a few and I gave them my pillows to adult love them too and if you go to throw boy dot com slash a mere or throw boy dot com slash Jake you get 15% off your first order if you have any kids or a kid like child later they were from both of us are you know I got you we both had till I know but I asked for a few to be sent 10 then they got it well I and if you’re if you as from Uncle air and salting we never been named that quality materials now they make a great gift because you love your kids live in Modi’s and actually my mom loves emojis everybody houses are those pillows got a really fun party favor actually please do check out throw ball I dot com slash mir or throw a dot com slash on to veer on your couch in your dorm room you know how to use pillows you completed on your couch and yeah I got a good please do check out google.com and all of our sponsors guys we don’t have the most popular podcast but we do have is the most dedicated fan base it’s you you listeners that make us look so good by visiting our sponsors it helps us it goes along way especially during this holiday season to at least check out these domain names that were thrown at you they’re coming fast and fierce but if you’re at all interested in getting an emoji pillow as a gift for someone in your life just checked that I double off your to-do list and gonna throw boy dot com slash or throw boy dot com slash Jake to check it out help them out help us out let’s go back to Elliot morgan’s episode of if I were you hey hey hey hey we’re back Elliott busy with now a day what’s your shit you know funny you should ask him I was just thinking about how of the plane that I was on from New York to LA crashed I wouldn’t really have any loose ends and that’s a that’s a little sad way to live so if you’re like I feel like I could die and it would be like an alright and there’s not like it’s not any open there’s not any pots on my fire that after tend to scare people might be a little sad but I feel like I’ve lived a full life in these 32 . whatever years if I think it’s beautiful dude good for you man what do you have what are you looking forward to just in terms of death for these days exactly not a lot of a soul mates you’d be leaving someone thinking about getting into drugs but the drugs ever done I’ve done of marijuana but I’m not a big fan of it that’s it yeah you are relatively clean have heard good things about mushrooms 0 alcohol you drink I drink far too much you’re poised at the bad stuff scotch scotch or whiskey in general all the time like bourbon bourbon as well I go back and forth between urban and iris was going back and forth like wire yeah actually go back and forth between bourbon and rehab just a funny little I do stand-up comedy and I do all over but I just about to go doing actually more touring in the beginning of the year you’re hitting the road like a real would rather biggest crap I actually don’t know they’re figuring that out as we speak there was a kind of like scientifically it’s so fascinating and I’ve never you know how we figured it out we look at our Facebook fans and by target we are probably two to three times more popular in Canada any city in america biggest cities are Toronto Vancouver and then like New York London Sydney Toronto for sure yeah yeah I didn’t I had no idea I never look at that stuff and then they were like trying to figure out where to send me and then the way it works basically is a long process that you have to go in your gonna start building up like local sort of recognition in these different comedy club venues are never proved yourself exactly and then you do a little bit more so and so and then I’m that is on the heels of my comedy special comes out December 10 on demand well you’re gonna be on the road in early December it’ll be no in early January after that I think comedy clubs attend and then kind of staying here in trying to do you know like podcasts yeah this is like the online world is now like you don’t you talk shows or movies video podcast for internet specials and we’re all we’ve all done stuff for YouTube instead of television this is all it this is the future kids are watching TV anymore there are downloading there failing in a meeting snapping and shadowing buying their apps from the Walmart from the apps are you all up on snap no I was for a while and then I got off gonna get I am i I was like you at first it was very I couldn’t I didn’t quite understand I felt like an old man at a kids party and now I’m more into it than like Facebook and Twitter I saw the filters that they did ya charging for the group filters yeah charger for the good filter so the show is all the filters rate and now you can like it you swipe far enough it’s like oh remember this old one you can use it for $0.99 give you the first that the drugs they give you some free shit to get you hooked now I need the good I need that you know I can just do what’s your name yeah it’s not entertaining at all you know what I will put a friend of mine now what’s this like the best I’m really goes fellow SourceFed guy is brilliant on separate I’m a mere bloom on snapchat you should follow me did I say you look at 85 didn’t choose our names based on how popular with us now joan was going to be an 85 mind with Elliott’s OTD su CKS in case you’re wondering but yes it was that’s how it goes I started by the way back when my Instagram was taken I don’t even look I just look for a mere and then be lol good enough but I sure everything else is very very methodically chosen yeah it’s kind of a weird like kind of a break from an online personality having a break from your brand is a very important thing well it’s not even a break now it’s the whole fucking thing then you can restructure entire branding somebody told me to life from the dying social media volt Twitter and Facebook blow it up now before it’s too late well nobody actually told me that it was a wizard in a dream of you could imagine you’re in the road in January you have a special status are coming out very good comedy been working on for a few years while I’ve been doing other things like hosting for mental flaws and I’ve new show outsourced had called the study where I play like this horrible human being named Elliot see Morgan different guy the C stands for changes every episode but cocaine different so it’s all just terrible terrible stuff like he’s like a one percent or below one percent 1% hers top of the top crammed which is another C word that’s that’ll be the next up your friends your of French pastry chef and then and then and then holidays yeah yeah you want to plug just hannukah shouts you mentioned early December learning a lot about that yeah you gotta hanukkah is the life raft of Christmas that slowly sinking so you better start blowing it up it’s the shape of a lot yes I do like don’t feel like they’re wearing your feet are League comfortable and it looked very high I don’t notice that I just like the idea that when I wear my shoes you can’t see any you can yeah yeah joggers joggers and then nike’s wearing Crocs on the pipe I’ll be but yeah I work rocks in the house chronic heel injury oh yeah oh yeah no way I broke my heel a couple years ago and I never really told us that sorry that happened how’d you break the deal I was rock climbing in Angeles National Forest you just killed any chance of me ever rock climbing totally worthwhile not dangerous I did try the mushrooms trust me I hurt myself all right we’re running out of time but I would you want to get to one last question to cause we only have so much valium or get in early lives let’s get one last whose name was it to me he came up with Peter what’s the coolest dudes oh you know what alright Tanner terrorist wouldn’t it be cool if the tennis like 10 is a pretty cool named Tanner even cooler but if you’re in his tennis yeah I know canning and he just in the middle of time to decide what extreme yet tender rights dropped you for trying to come up with Channing Tatum Channing Tatum Channing Tatum I’m sweating legitimate twin sister tanning je t’aime rights and other guy penetrating the guy rates hearing on the more mature side of your audience I’m 32 I write to you about a conundrum I faces is that so is right tenant cheatham is Channing Tatum’s illegitimate sister she’s 32 and she has a conundrum she faces when she’s dating the ages of 18 to 25 I was vocal about my sexual desires especially anal sex this attracted perhaps 11 or to genuinely good relationships with amazing sex but a whole string of assholes who immediately pegged me as a booty call material which doesn’t interest me at all my conclusion was men instantly associate I sexually liberated vocal female as a quick lay who doesn’t respect herself and doesn’t need respect growing up and beginning to abide by the mantra you attract what you project I have to say I’ve had to censor myself over the years become more prim and even a little coy this change in the types of men who I attracted decent the men who want a monogamous relationship and due respect me the problem is this these good boys are also good boys in bed their vanilla there’s nothing more frustrating than being in a long-term relationship with someone who dislikes anal but this doesn’t become clear for the first two months you’re still getting to know each other by then you either deal with it or break up quite a waste of time a life without posterior delights is a dull life indeed having followed you from CollegeHumor to your podcast you to embody the ass dichotomy one of you loves the ass the other does not what are some ways to spot an ass man without bringing it up before you start getting intimate how can you tell if someone is sexually adventurous are there any tell tale signs regards to any cheetah the very mature question yeah first of all two things one I never said I dislike but I just said I’ve never had anal sex and it’s a little harder I don’t know if I dirty but I wouldn’t but she’s saying that I’m not an ass man I still like assets I just think that you know sex as I’ve never done it if someone to try perhaps I’d be into it over to the best flavors so don’t fucking that’s not a if you defending it proves her point I might try anal if somebody asked me to I just find it dirty and I love we know we know you think it’s the best place gets a bad rap but your thoughts on vanilla chocolate really quick ok but I’m not shocked shocked when go for now but you don’t have to answer this question but anal year now keep in mind if you’re not comfortable we’re not forcing you to answer I want here now because I don’t think that it is a year now so it’s a grey it’s a grey to an to speak to her and I know she’s not talking to me and that’s just about to benefit from your wisdom tanning nice to meet you and you know I would be described as one of the vanilla gentlemen I grew up in a very conservative environment and for it and therefore the prospect of sexual liberation in males and females are certainly something that is a process but in my humble opinion I think that it’s very important to broach the subject as you get to know somebody not in a way that you try to or not try to label them from the outside because you really don’t know what I would also argue that some of these men who might be considered vendela maybe or simply having hangups of their own and therefore that requires simply more open conversations would be my idea but that’s all theoretical and also I have your personal email and I’ll fuck you in the ass for a moment it looked like you and I was like fuck you in the ass advice and get in the bed I just wanted to bring back that I think it’s a good point that the people she’s complaining about being vanilla they may also have desires to fuck her in the ass like to play with her but like it could be any situation will like it could be even it could be a me situation they could be dying to touch her butt hole and they’re like she’s so prim and proper she doesn’t want me to touch her but wouldn’t that come up in the first couple sexual encounters don’t deepen understanding I had sex where I wanted to touch a bowl and I didn’t because I wanted to like 12 months feels like a long time to get there before even broaching the subject it is a dip in a tough situation have to sort of like being the person who is like that guide yeah yeah puts even more pressure on her but I feel like you know she’s wanting both things and she’s wanting like a lasting committed relationship with like a good dude is not going to be her with respect that it might you know depending on that dude psychological makeup might require stereotyping is it really that cut and dry that like mean guys like anal and improper nerds that might be good marriage material dont like anal sex like kind of a deviant sexual behavior which I don’t think it is but there is nothing but that’s all I could think about ask yourself why do think that the way to do it if she wants to talk about this type of thing with people it’s like asked what their fetishes are and stuff because once people share their fetishes they’re a lot more open to hearing about a nice way they cause it’s kind of weird to be like can I tell you what I like I like when you get to its like what do you like in bed it’s like probably after you’ve gone in like with them with the communication thing or so I think ultimately means that she will not be able to ever look upon another person and no based on their like the person I could see you guys gonna switch that around an hour had no idea you don’t like it when you’re hooking up with somebody was the first part of their body that you I guess their boobs yeah and I’m schoolyard bully thats shaking your mate upside down his fall out now that actually stealing somebody’s milk money in a cartoon that’s what I’ve been doing you’ve been in a car to texts have you have you ever what about sticking but what if she sticks a cucumber in her ass and her ass are you should have sound like a joke and it’s going to sound like I’m not being serious but what if I refers to a sex tape she leans over spread your asshole she shoves a cucumber and dill pickle and harass like I’m making something like I’m not even a hypothetical situation hypothetical question what if during the day and I’ll try to take the series during the day yes our cafe she brought it on her own she can bring you here social stand up stand up and bend over the table and i couldnt advised that would be the most psychopathic things would be carted away to a mental hospital for doing that it’s lewd in illegal behavior ok public indecency weighed in with your suggestion nothing got a communique and and you know I think you might be a little earlier you may be able to bring it up a little earlier than two months and I think you definitely bring up during a sexual thing however long that takes two and a half months that’s ok to its ok let’s cut in half months you gotta go bye bye bye bye bye but like what during sex for the first time you just tell them over to her problem is that she thinks when she asks for but stuff early on that then guys consider her a floozy labels but that’s also I mean there there’s ways to convey sort of that she’s not that I think she’s 32 now by the time with a car I can’t really connect with like the 20 year old version of myself but I think at least now somebody asked for something in there but I don’t think there were a whore especially if there’s already like cucumber and i cant believe that you are actually acute the thing is my calling is tilted Brian anyway so I think that’s what you gotta be but but but I think it come a little earlier than the two-month sure whether without visuals yes I know Jake to just one way and I’m another company which you just did her publicly yourself with a vegetable suggested talking a lot yeah I guess but Elliott painter coming back dude open for you know when you’re on the road that’s how it’ll work for sure yeah you’re gonna get rejected so let’s do it we should mention that we’re going on the road to december second fourth fifth and sixth we’re going to San Francisco Portland Seattle Vancouver tickets are still available ryushare.com anything you want to plug one last time Morgan special dot com that’s what elliott Morgan special dot com dropping soon website should be live by the time the hell yes let us know because I want to watch it now the opening theme song was written by fan the closing one also written by fans have anything songs of your own or questions for us the email address for everything is if I were you show @ gmail.com thank you morning of raiding the opening line and this closing what is written by bill in Barstow thanks again to LA for coming by thank you much appreciated will be back next week