Episode 20: Honesty


In this episode we discuss Burning Man, the merits of lying, and the truth about herpes.

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not like the way what is Hulu Plus great
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otherwise I’m just gonna be like a real
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your default setting is mad and angry so

don’t dump it and I’m not having a smile
on your default to deliver usually

I anyway thanks so much for listening
guys and I enjoy the absurd thank you

Ohio area that scare you

good do %uh begins

therapy doom

& imy do you but yeah

3 and yeah

do I’ll you only do you

show think Jake I

jazzy what do you think I love it I just
love that I have for you

I can have my zone would they go out the

I I like to pretend that he’s playing
the song just for me

that’s not the only reason you’re happy
that that was from Caleb

yeah and we are recording today once

in regulating kick us out military kick
us out but then they allowed us to come

back came back

%uh so we appreciate that yet again I
will come

welcome will come Bill Coleman to a fire
you the only advice podcast on the


hosted by us unamir and I am Jake

and herpes is sorry and say yeah

um I turns out you know

well not always both of us are not
always gonna be right now

advice well you are you buy more respect
I think we we warn people about that you

know we’re not professionals were

two weeks ago you gave the were both a
little bit because it incorrectly I did

I said are you sure you are I wasn’t I
was more upset you know how to be a man


FS out so two weeks ago you gave what
was probably the worst advice not only

is ever

that has ever been given on the show but
the worst advice may be given ever it

was borderline

illegal negligent yeah I cuz I mean I
know a lot about yeah possible teenagers

you guys are very susceptible to these

thank you you just gave ’em grew
flagrantly damaging but I feel bad


II looking so here’s what the deal is
about as TV’s folks

what did you say originally I believe I
what I said was something along the

lines of

you can get herpes without like they’re
being open sores for it you’ll be able


hell if somebody has committee agreed to
RIA which is there that you tell

yourself to make yourself so I don’t
think that I have committee are gonna

reactor that I probably have familiar
gonorrhea herpes and HIV I certainly

have HPV

three aces 0 here’s what here’s the big

here truth I live there are there

there you can get clomidia and gonorrhea
%ah showing

no symptoms at all no not really it is
actually very bad for you

okay there are strains have gonorrhea
that are um

actually a becoming um

I their immune

the their immune to drugs that you can’t
cure them direct

and said what else what else is OK can
also catch hurt you can get herpes

without there being open sores or any
outbreak at all

so every every little thing you said two
weeks ago was incorrect

yeah and then UN and you got educativa

I got educated I’d for myself and I’m
actually going to tomorrow

%uh to a free STD clinic

in New York wow so this is a
completeness this podcast is not only

helping our audience it’s also helping

yeah how many attack for all the STD’s
and then what do you think is going to


I love host Seth the I we should give a
live update

when you like is it a phone call you
receive an envelope they open easily be

oscar’s Netherlands II was tested for HD

HIV um they called have to message

and it’s like so some like AJ could have
the results appear

HIV test and yours a slight oh my god I
have it

his cuz you hear someone say that it’s
like yeah the results very

unfortunately we are you do you have %uh
the results

the worst operationally here you’re good
to go they’re like God

please call us back know how we would
you if if I would have to call back

ever call back in there like just got
there you’ve got results you tested


for HIV and I was like is low positive
damn you they’ll have it

I because negative as I know it is a bad
thing we’re saying it’s bad that get 1i

in layman’s terms 5th CIR ever get it
done I

am i dead yet %uh but anyway

if you guys are concerned everybody
should get tested and actually if you’re

sexually active

even if you don’t have a concern you
should get tested because

these things I can show no symptoms at
all and they’re very dangerous to go


and the dangers to other people not just
a year yes so if you are sleeping if

you’re sexually active

at all these things can be transmitted
through oral sex

anal sex vaginal sex I used up all the
good Kansas accept all of my favorite

sex is

thats for the that’s great now you can
sleep at night well the excess of to get

tested then wait

well hopefully in weaker to all you to
be able to sleep

or be dead I either way either way I’m
dieted HIV I think I

great we go online to get that out of
our system right off the bat

the show is a it said this is an advice
podcast we get emails from real people

who are and you know sticky difficult
places in their lives and we try to

advise them

that as best sometimes completely and
correctly I

will try to never be as wrong as Jake
was two weeks ago

%uh ever again but a it’s gonna happen

and we are we do our best to offer up

best advice we can give or at the very
least what we would do in that situation

and we hope that is helpful at all at
the very least at the very least will

give you wrong information to make fun
of me for 10 minutes there

but that’s the very least Mozilla to the

hit that bottom bottom bar that we had a
bet that a rock rock bottom

and people can email us and have been on
emailing us a

at if I were you show at gmail dot com

I shall we get started why not I got one
week to live

I couldn’t litigate get out we see this
locker cells in here an answer as many

questions as possible said the very
least they can release

twenty to forty podcast after your death
got ya to mislead yourself is

each one sponsored by Hulu I

they they are actually they actually a
paid for 40 absurd after your death

that was in the contract up you’re gonna
die either way

alright a really email fake name

we’re gonna go with Tommy Tommy Tommy

Tommy rights hello dudes so there’s this
girl that I was going out with a few


a few years back and she recently moved
in next door we started talking and

walking our dogs together so naturally I
started the Laker again

everything was going so smoothly till I
found out she is in a serious


now a boyfriend is threatening me on
Facebook and she is not responding to my


should I be her boyfriend up or should I
keep trying to win her heart without


I really like you and I trust that you
guys will have some good advice

thanks Tommy you trusted wrong kisses

good so in his mind is two options are
you and I don’t like yours is


beat up the boyfriend order and Ukraine

and when the girl like a video game
using violence yeah

or two steal her without violence

so both options are that she want that
he was to break up the relation are no

he’s gonna break off the relationship he
just wants to know whether he should

beat up the guys like what how are you
sure you can be the guy up

why why would you say he can’t I guess
maybe 10 because by this guy is such a

%uh the such a loser that is threatening
about Facebook I

well but this guy’s I emailing in a
podcast night got well all you guys are

lame either go to beat up everybody I
just feel the dog

and goes awry dogs now I think I

that she’s so a it’s where that he
thinks he can beat up the boyfriend in

when the girl raped

I guess is that this is an hour this is
Anna Popeye cartoon

know this isn’t how things word this
isn’t back to the future it’s

I don’t get the sock the ball he added
depth eagerly anticipated

I as long as somebody calls you yell
over right there there’s like a

I don’t know yet if you put someone in
the face you can like fractured a bone

in their face and then we’ll sue you

itself i do. alleged the realistic outgo
did is just like the school

alright I get the girl um no actually I
have to go to a doctor I need %uh

surgery on my eye socket

no god she’s she’s she if anything this
brought us closer together cuz he feels

bad for you know I now realize is
driving me to the emergency room visits

the small nobler

in her eyes and she likes that we’re
suing you

for %uh the full extent of the medical
bill and then also

I you know emotional distress I said
they are gonna get some STD tests while

I’m done in OK at the number on the STD

a I made one god damn mistake on his
podcast an area to live it down

you do get a load out it’s been one
episode it I had nine minutes I V zal

brea bennett sylvester

the from 32 I for like episode 2

I de pol teeth conference I could s

I I every mistake we make you better
believe our listeners are gonna be on

top of that shit

um I do the I got more people tweeting
at be about getting sylvester on baghdad

as early as you think

that’s a dangerous it was yeah everybody
just took that pic

from a great no open source open season

but big my dick is a burning I they
should be GTG

no so if he’s not gonna be this guy up
his other option is to steal your heart

without violence

which is i mean how the year will I
figure if we walk enough dogs together

she’ll eventually fall in love with a
little turned off that she was likely

the yuan while having a serious

dirt I’m also aren’t you a little
perturbed by the fact that

her boyfriend is threatening on Facebook
and she’s not replying to your text

right now is taking his side also that
she’s your ex which be that didn’t work

out one

I you want another chance resale a
salvage this relationship

yeah positive why %uh

she’s I don’t know I guess my advice

if I were you pal I is to just remove
yourself entirely from the situation

take your little dog to a dog park and
try to meet somebody new

%uh that’s cute would you say dogs are
babe magnets

shymanski I graduate

except I her leg up

ok air quote babe magnet Victor babe
repellent Iran with you

you I’m like a spread a like FIU

doin up so I feel like you would get on
me and then I would not be able to

attract the ladies

I little bug zapper think doug’s

think doug’s fewer attract I mean people
both sexes good dogs are so grateful H

and it’s also not very easy way to talk
to somebody the thing that actually

works like oh you have a cute dog down
the track to to you

and no cuz I’ve had I’d like walk dogs I
mean I’ve had dogs

and been out with them and how girls
come up but like

pay only attention to the dog and not
even look at me I think it helps that

like you have to be good with the ladies
and then it’s like the dog

much like a magnet attracts the ladies
but it’s not actually get her to be

attracted to you it’s just the right
away and getting her over there

I saw some dude at a bar wants I you’ve
got that I guess that is they will know

that right a broad I which is cool like
that’s great

well he was so using if you would like

walk us through the girl was killed she
wants to meet you

I law sled dogs and every two weeks yeah
that’s right here

yeah I’ve dragging like cardizem a dog
maggots crawling in at the ice I did

she wants to meet you you’re under
arrest for and no she wants the rear

would threaten that God Facebook fleas
flying in and out like that

season 8 50 open brain cavity leases I

with you say that’s the saddest thing in
the world or telling a buncha teenagers

that they can you get herpes B

if you don’t see open source som which
one would you say is the saddest

because one is actually is the man to
teenagers I’ve already given her keys


spare you it really mister herwitz you
have all the STD’s

they just don’t affect you and will not
affect you ever so I’ll

so I’m just carrier I

if 20 I

your for little more over

or more more more MORE 0 210 210

he added well it’s a big change is the
new out like tender

I it in their Zach tag nope

about it is ill has dado 10 is the
better rapid but Han changes getting

their hinges

into the pretty dope ap him to the new
dating out folks

it I it only matches you with befriends
a friends on Facebook and also only

gives you like eight matches today

friends and friends on being the aids


it is pretty good but I mean I suggest
being on both

endure on OK Cupid I at 10 kHz shared

I and tender

as I did through the BI Craigslist
personal than the newspaper classified


ira Firefly a yelp review is seamless

price still be it was fun sometimes I do
is search the has tagged pretty babe on

Instagram I follow

anybody that pose ideas telander tweet
at me

I have met a girl in real life in two
years I

long-legged liz is looking at other APs

i cant transfer MTV’s I’m page can I

I I i order in Hoover car every day and
I hope to god it’s a female driver I

meet a lot of chicks

LA I that my future wife I neuberger

I up do who is this guy is closed
entirely forget

City beat up his girlfriend reside his

a boyfriend or try to win her heart
using non by at least try using

non-violence I guess

that I love those two bad options will
choose the lesser of two evils which is

not beating the guy up

is that will not work %uh church at a
Steeler I don’t know fuck you for giving

us both that the second week we’ve had
multiple choice yeah

they don’t rely Cassanova got a
professional actually speaking of

getting feedback from our audience

some lady wrote in an gave me feedback
that was very eye-opening

with a a previous question they reminded
me of this one which was

some guy like said that he asked a girl
out multiple times and he has is wonder

whether you should do it again

ratner lecture charlotte’s yeah you
might as well keep trying

but then she said that its it’s
dangerous and potentially damaging

advised the time to keep going after a
girl cuz

she kept on saying no no no and he
should take a hint

and it starts to get scary to keep
attracting air going after the same lady

over and over again

us that was a that was your wrong advice
yet I was my wrong advice

this guys are gonna die got the OK
appears not to say that he thinks he is

always your values are true that when I
me too large a jackass

okay no wonder chicks rebel you

I that video live through a mouth filled
with herpes

da a deluded give me your mouth is an
open sewer to use your words my herb I

so I think the advice I we gave is is
every girl now

not knowing what I know because I did
not reply to your text just please

yet leave her alone which was my initial
advice actually to remove yourself from

the situation

yeah rumors and do we get this person is
this the first question that we

took and there’s the 42 minute what I

yeah there was the first question right
that was one we haven’t we have an ant

we haven’t done a second question right

let’s do it I think I am lose it so the
next five minutes the event was the

first question

alright yeah that was %uh the first one

have we done the second I just 300 do

I you even very different areas and they
got back from break

then about negative use it use whether
we give positive time in the dozen you

came back and now you just gotta

catch up on missed negativity or some
shit yep

a we should talk about bringing that a
lot of people are curious about your

you’re a exploits their rightly says at
least one more question yeah I feel bad

we’re not giving the people what they
pay for zero dollars for

five questions alright ready question
numero do well

this one comes from Angelica Angelica
dear dudes

a few months ago my long-term boyfriend
and I took a break from our relationship

I was under the impression that this
break was a means to an end and I was

really hurt and sad

one night I hooked up with a new guy in
an attempt to make me feel okay about my

recent breakup

after about a month my boyfriend and I
saw that our differences and we got back


yea however he asked me if I’d hooked up
with anyone

and I only have told them the truth
saying that I kissed a boy

when in reality i totes being 21 I feel
terrible about not telling i buy from

the whole truth

especially now months later he still
brings up that kiss and always goes on

about how much he appreciates my honesty
in our relationship

on the friggin phony do I tell my
boyfriend the truth that the hookup

happen or should forever be a secret I
keep between us

and all your podcast listeners banks

cell it’s cool that we gotta we gotta
message from a lady fan

yeah see girls can mess up to it’s not
just do the best girls mess up more than


I your you’re a loser for doing that you
weak willed loser

I suit yeah that’s tough it is actually
situation indeed

yea you already you light it up we may
come clean about

I like that the boyfriend brings it up
as a means of saying like how much you

appreciate your honesty

bye bye for now is brings up the kiss
and yeah he really appreciate how honest

I am

regulators say they still don’t think it
is cutting a carrot staring at her

I I keep thinking about that a kiss and

how happy I am about how honest you were
with me yeah it’s less because figure oh

my god I do feel that break I got there

I I don’t feel god damn thing I’m sorta

number with your honesty I

I yeah I mean if I were you if I were

this show hi fi re I probably would not
tell ur

tile tell him you visit yeah I wouldn’t

I A to me doesn’t mean anything so like

what he thinks is that ike I kiss
someone and it didn’t mean anything

when in actuality she bone someone and
it doesn’t mean anything

if you tell her that if you tell them
that you bone someone

then all a sudden he’s gonna think that
it meant a lot when in actuality it


right series or initially it’s gonna
seem like it meant a lot because the

you’ve hit for so long rikers and it’s
like oh what are you hiding what else

are you hiding but I really don’t like

I don’t like advocating letting bill
loved ones

the evidence this is this it’s real
honest advice

alright this is this is not adviser
gonna get in a god damn Dear Abby column

were advocating lying yet we’re dear

fitness a dear abby: not

is a dear savvy and I Chevy is it get

you’re actually talking the earlier how
great lying is yeah

lying is like it’s perfect because like

you just you just don’t tell the truth
and that people’s feelings are good yeah

I get away with this year

later we’re in a relationship in you
cheat on someone you can still like

you can still cheat on someone and get
laid which is fun and then when that


lover ASI just like a he alive make
something yes

and it’s like ok great I got to have sex
with a stranger

and it hurt my loved ones feel the ad
sir like having your cake and eating it

too in that regard

yes so I was like everybody wins when
everyone gets to live yeah it’s like if

you just didn’t feel guilty about lying

it would be perfect like oh you can you
please come to my dinner

now I can I have a friend in town i jus
wanna go home to watch breaking bad

that’s it yeah I’m lying to you

%ah so you don’t get your feelings hurt
and I’m doing what I want to do which is

going on lunch break now that I want to
feel guilty because you’re out to dinner

without me thinking like I can hang out
for a good reason so you’re saying line


probably the best thing that someone can
wear something all this doesn’t just

it just doesn’t like to lie is that a
thriller is learned

I think I guess is also like there’s the
concert when you lie that you’re on you

like an idiot like you can always
remember the truth

it’s hard to keep track of lies %uh is

you can always remember the truth it’s
hard to keep track of lies or advice is


keep better track of your lies yeah I
mean it is only this one live and yes

sir yeah

as long as you lie only once a day you
cancer to keep track event in a Google


that you can call I you’re not quote him
write down all of your love you wouldn’t

we finally

says where do when leak because I’m
going to call you and me you’d be

discreet about you call it like I
recipes are

I’ll ways to lie down for like lies in
quotes like things that late little

tips that the help you remember where
your lies are

you don’t know how to live you that is a
radio I feel like as the guy that

Angelica fucked I just

I babe on cooling

with you tell your boyfriend all
corroborate the story that it meant


do please I’m begging you I want him to

I think it depends on how I can it if
you guys can just like

to move on in life well it’s not him it
hurts all her

can she move on yeah on if it’s gonna
eat her alive obviously it’s not worth


right if you live with the guilt every
day but like my advice is to at least

try to be cool with the lifers for a
little easier to see how it fits

try it on for a week if it’s an
uncomfortable thing then you can deal

with it later

but you know what he’s into it like hey
I said I kissed a guy but a call me a


I do it at all all right one I really
appreciate that came clean now

Kafu appreciates honesty got a manner
which is going to appreciate you when

you tell that you bone someone that

um Angelica heart I i jus wanna bring up
again the fact that %uh

I’m what I’ve totally change that guy
and our

how much I appreciate your delayed
honesty in that regard is that was a

that was a lie you could just take it to
the grave in the bag that you told me

about it all means you’re so

God I can appreciate you more than I do
right now I really do I really feel like

I’ve maximum appreciation

I and I appreciate that %uh turns out a
bang four guys I

did you then the app God I can
appreciate your honesty dom four you


who every little bit of a lot is
cheering thread and other to smile him

as the gun there

but got a sweet and the kids get this
morning doctor because I’m centerpiece

she’ll be the preseason poll it appears
in my heart magnet grow fonder for you a


you you fuckin loser where I can find
review and you have no idea that your

girlfriend cheated on you

shouldn’t cheat on and where we were
just on a break yet there are we were on

a break

rumor that up assertive a ago the whole
series are kaam yeah

yeah so that users in India if you know
we were honored that my love that Berlin

Ross met Russ

going to sleep was a billion dollars is
mostly a period on this Google

amor go think lease please down

I good to questions deep

to questions deep in that one hour
markers okay

ID on a tag to burning at all I know
there is not know that nothing really

crazy epic happen by anyone even

with you talking about layoffs I

Burning Man is in in the paint UK so it
is it though one week long I guess like

arts and

drug Festival in the Desert drug

or did you do allow drug faded a drug 50
does that ever under drugs rail

the brawl goalie kids like a pageantry

I were what freedom how is it hosted how
will I would

it’s weird I would go I like I really
don’t wanna make fun to Bernie Mac it’s

a funny delay talk about but like it’s
an amazing experience

I loved it incredible the deal do you
feel a little ashamed loving it because

they’re such negative

a energy around people who didn’t go to
Burning Man like a burning man’s like

fake and phony and they’re all the
people that love it are lame liquor you

and bears that all to admit that you
love that as much as they did

now I think that everybody everybody was
there was there felt the way I did

and anybody that feels negative about it
I would just encourage that

to try to go and see what it’s like

but I I can I cannot imagine going there
and coming back and be like

everybody there sucked I can imagine
that now everyone’s so

opened in positive and nice that you
can’t you cannot

at the very least I can understand to be
like I don’t like being hot the entire

time I was uncomfortable ray

the people who are there are pretty
amazing rat but I bet if my parents went

there would likely they would think all
the people there are

he be losers it this is such an odd bird

I non burner it you

OJ really bother people there are you
there millionaire or losers who I i cant

get their life together enough to do
anything but I did as a delay

like my brothers i his shoes there’s
another thing the table they said they

want to encourage that I think you’re a
piece a shit

yeah I like how the writing was a that
was on the wall was all fake away I am

stupid shallow IIIC to intellectual by

ship my order the face now how do you
for this is

I just got the non burner at a year
there if is back

your a fucking loser yeah level

a positive that your a fucking loser now

saw you say was the most but resounding
like viable the week

I think that I it was it drugs no

I think a really hot guy I know I

lameness and said no cuz I don’t think
I’ve found whereby know how you’re going

to do it because you guys are non
burners you gonna get is a lens is

really is like

I the thing that you leave with the
feeling that you’ll be with his like

accepted that positivity

so like there are drugs and people
except embrace the people who were doing

drugs but people except

at a press people who are doing drugs
and there’s like four-year-olds and

a year olds there this fat people skinny
people and hot people hungry people and

people in close and people funny outfits
and people completely naked

every single person has just celebrated
for being there minutes

it’s amazing that’s it way that will

what percentage of the population there
was white

I that’s the that’s an unfortunate thing
is a

very very ethnically that I

bored so in other words a lot a lot a
way this I bet there is

I mean there is entirely too many white
people there there’s is they’ve

a president said it was like Coachella
are your woodstock

where like a only a is a very accessible
that’s why I you more people

word people a different ethnicities
should go and they’d but the acceptance

I want to be the four hundred dollar
entrance fee it’s very sad that some

people couldn’t pay that fee

now I’m just saying you’re saying
successful maybe since not as accessible

as you think maybe it’s water dousing a
lot of money

forty dollars a lotta money to some
people for example not to me because I’m

rich but like us on to you

yet some poor but ice was the little do
it yeah yeah but you ended up having to

borrow a lotta money from a new yeah
actually at the money that I need bag

and then when it you got back you are
you said you don’t believe in my not

cash the

body out there drive as long as you fill
up your gas tank in girl I can you get

all your supplies at Walmart and Home

you can once you get inside a playa a no
money brother

I hope you book limbaugh’s in target I

pic is the otherwise you will die and
those guys licence ID you please make a

lotta starts at McDonalds Starbucks
Walmart Target

and then once you get in the air but the
victory for either the idea casual is

that they had a net

I yeah whatever fits it’s a Nature
Valley commercial

will keep on talking about Burning Man
its its part to me now

this actually every question you answer
now we’ll be talking about Burning Man

is some way shape or form

I am burning I alright let’s go on to
the third question

an this one comes from

another lady which we collar

lil lil hmm

my uncle recently took over our family
owned restaurant and is constantly

complaining about the high level of
stress that it is he is particularly

brought up there

IT guy claiming that he’s lazy and way

not having nearly enough work to do on
Facebook friends with the guy sister and

she posted a status yesterday

being jealous over genius brother being
able to finish the entire game of candy

crush in a month

one month without cheats I don’t know if
either view our crushers

but I am and I know that it’s nearly
impossible Mac definitely impossible

unless you’re playing 10 hours a day
every day and doing nothing else it

cannot be done

its fine merger levels a pure torture
I’ve been out over five months myself no

cheats and I’m on level 3 50

should I tell my uncle and get this guy
fired over this game

he definitely deserves it on the other
hand though maybe he is a genius

and just with the family restaurant need
solving all its it. troubles Thank You


what’s I this is there was unique

question we’ve ever received because it
meant nothing if this print this

question is faking you made it up

I wanna hire you because you have the
most interesting a match in Asian I’ve


read about that is that’s the most

pointless he has ever I there’s not much
to answer here you’re really low the

restaurant you up

your there’s an IT guy that he already
doesn’t like the idea of the lady I

your friends at the IT guys sister on
Facebook shares posted the brother

the candy crowley anti-christ and you’re
not a crusher

I’ve got a crush from a burner grows a
lot I love

so you’re saying if there’s no way he
could have done it without playing a lot

which means he’s

neglecting his job as an IT guy or he is
actually a genius

and maybe ronko should keep him keeping
hired her lesson once you pair phrase

that it does seem like a more logical
question like

this guy plays a lot of video games said
she tell her uncle or is it a good sign

I don’t give a fuck about your family
restaurant I

unless it’s a three hours north the Reno
Nevada in the middle and Black Rock City

Nevada I don’t give a shit about your
restaurant is because that’s where I

still am

market took my soul is on that flyer you
want me on that wall

you meet me on that flyer hah okay I
giving this question our first skip

yeah the tourists kept quite tell you
what I think no matter what you do in

this situation the world’s gonna keep on
turning everything’s gonna be fine

up over ever positivity

you’re already a positive guy before
burning man though didn’t really change


yep it was nice to be surrounded by
people who were as positive if not more

positive than me

do you think your mom would like it
she’s a very positive person and she was

so she sorta trepidations about you on a
burning Man

yeah I think I think she would really
like it I think the only thing that’s

um sorta tough about it is the climate

yeah but I if you had if you decide
you’re just gonna like just gonna do it

then yeah

I think anybody would really have fun
there what about a cynical have three

like myself

I would like to see you go there I
thought you would at the very least get

a big kick out of it there’s a lot that
you can make

laugh and smile at you’re pretty
positive to you not actually that


now thanks man from I’ll doubt know I
did the government you know that’s

I didn’t cover my year that now I really

you’re cynical it it help to hear you
say that

use some cuz now I know that I and I
hate you

better than the youth wire you that

I and now I if that

I makes any sense liked though this

X your comments this podcast thing have
to be

no how they’ll have taking an hour

rather thick for me I guess in the long
run two years I say that you suck

to hear you say that means so much more

you will after orkut every day right now

a I I have question number four

yeah alright for hours at a time but I
don’t add on that weird ass candy crush


I here we are okay

cell you know how and how those high
school shows who is this from

a loaded question Phil cell Liles twin

the okay so you know how in those high
school shows the nerd always gets

ignored by the popular girl he has a
crush on

well a few days ago the nerd me finally
mustered up the courage to ask the

popular girl out

to my surprise she said yes she has way
more experience with dating then i do.

I totally wasn’t prepared for this what
do I do

I rely like this questions yet you look
at this guy’s Google

Pray Love yeah buddy I’ll it to your
Google Plus profile

personal just the fact that you have a
Google+ account means you are the

biggest nerd at school

you um weren’t lying about being in

I let me describe this guy to everybody

if I you were 85 pounds

if not a foot if wearing a purple button
down shirt with a purple tie

and a black fedora do BI

cover our up your Google Plus profile

is a beer is they’ve fire-breathing

I who pledged I think we’re allowed to
make fun of them because we were that

kid in high school

I wasn’t to you in two stages say you
had a chain with a dollar sign at the

end of it

that you are on your neck that’s so much
later that has good girl that you told

me that one thousand

eighth-grade had a I know that high
school I was cool nice cool man

I you all this guy was just as nerdy as
I was in high school and I i for on a

plot as effort for asking out the
popular girl

I don’t think he’s a loser actually I
don’t think yeah

popular girl you think he’s lying I
would say your life that make you

your delusion the grander don’t stop at
the dragon and your profile picture they

actually bleed India real live where you
email as saying your fantasy situations

I had no I you’re a good man you’re I
left my guide K

as I sorry I was an asshole but I and II

give you a couple bit now gone too far
you’re a bully and yes I know they cover


fairly do I use it this guy’s gonna grow
to be some kinda evil villains super-g


yeah auletta goes all the nerds in high
school grow up to be cool and all the

cool guys goes up grow up to be losers

the nerds will inherit the earth the

so bull is if you’re listening out there
beat the shit outta the nerds now

because if they died I’ll never become
stronger and better than you think

that’s worse than telling people that as

are not I basically not contagious I

so here’s my advice for this guy the

something I have realised sending I am
gonna try to verbalize

is a relationships

like let’s say from how to its fifth
price should have thought about this

so our relations mean you talking red
when we talk about stuff that I know


I feel better than you like we were
talking about like a

math or sports knowledge business your

you shrink and I am the bigger
personality the better person in the


mom and it happens instantly and then
the second the topic changes to like

dating and stuff that you’re better at I
suddenly shrink and you become the

better personality

and that like whatever you’re currently

that that’s where all the way it lies so
this girl is popular in the nerd is not

you should take her to a thing that you
excel and she doesn’t

and she will feel much smaller than year
for the duration of the night

so I do understand that what you said is

for them and I’ll ever but the advice
that you give and yeah

is for a guy to take a girl to someplace
where she’s uncomfortable and making

sure any

I rather it is already

as the day 2 30 I’ll say that’s not a
good day for anybody who lives in a

better for her to feel uncomfortable
than for him

I think it’s probably better to go
somewhere where both both them Jan like

there’s an have been floated like who
lead the conversation let me tell you


you wanna make your girls nervous bottle
service makes the models nervous why is

that a good thing because you what
models to be nervous in your presence


idea understood that suggest that the
saying Yahoo says that besides douchebag

I models I guess models say

bottle service makes the me nervous so
this girls probably at a higher social


and like more comfortable than this guy
in ninety-eight percent in the things

that they could possibly do

but maybe there’s a thing there’s a
two-percent thing that he can take ur


that suddenly makes her look up to him
and some weird

positively ray I guess it depends what
kinda near you are maybe you take your

two in a science museum or something
maybe there’s some

but I don’t like the idea of him taking
her delight

some sort about a practice SAT class yet
look that up

Magic the Gathering II meet up no no no
you don’t make her feel like holy shit

who is this weirdo

why you take your bowling neba I’ll keep
score I’m great at math

I you get is so do add up these pains in
your head 875 in three

did you get 23 I did I also feel bad for
making fun of him so much I just came

from Brady man where the

ideas to be openly accepted every I
itself but if there is any way to tell

you just know that my aids

gotta understand I’m not on the fly
right now I might

my soul still as Jacob is still on the
fly over right now I’m sorta back yet

now like as soon as I got out the desert
I was like harkin appear before giving

people the finger in traffic I like moon
fucking loser

I analisi that quickly that’s why I
gotta go back

yeah I don’t know I don’t I’m not sure
how to go out with

the hot girl if you like if you’re going
to be nervous around her I mean at least

I think you gotta do it would bring you
to a place that you’re the most


right but not somewhere where she’ll be

did a lot better that than anything else
carry in your heart though the fact that

she said yes

so maybe she’s and at least intrigued by
you yeah carried in your heart to let it

trickle down to your dick

and then carried in your dick and balls
for like a minute tell you another thing

you’re gonna show up on this date and
you’re gonna be eg by heard her

boyfriend rather crowded

I zile Bugarach it into a god damn

track I your you understand that right

feel they can be built a human mouse
trap game outside her apartment

he’s gonna leave under a retarded
feathered a fake

a throwing up from the flagpole like the
loser you are

left for dead and you know what I’m
gonna be the one that bugging drags you

out there

I well while your mind you’re going to
show up me like I’m gonna make her feel


I made her feel real small I wanna get a

I believe you’re a given me I am I

I a but you know even if it doesn’t work
out with this girl

%ah your day will come nerds do get

do get inherently more accepted as they
grow older and I will say that it’s

pretty cool that you had the balls to
ask out the popular girl

there this year just keep keep going
with with that vibe you know

you the confidence yeah all right now we
are definitely at a time

but I really like this episode was a
good mix uva you making for him even not

too much you

and %uh you really build me up and then
ultimately me

taking the show home with a with a lot a
good positive happy

funny advice and it is how 10 E

you are like to try to protect yourself
right now are you talk to you guys

watching building his wife

I just don’t wanna read any negative
comments about me

more than anything else %ah yeah that is

they at where we’re done we’re at a time
but we want to talk about our first

a live podcast he’s very it’s we’re
having a

for the first time ever gonna be doing a
live recording of this podcast

and would be great to pack the house for
people who already know what the podcast


that seems like a lot of a fun friendly
environment and do a lot of fun things


actually answer audience questions and
have less audience participation

yeah and we should we should try to get
some cool special guests to arrive till

now because

um is alive I live interest signed by me

color is it all for me hand guy already
Lovato is lol ya is selling on other

give away too much look at the but I
will do that I promise if the show is in

Brooklyn Nets parlor New York Comedy
Festival and it’s a

Wednesday November 6 that little fields
seeking good a little field and Y C dot

com and look for it there or you can go
to if I were you show dot com

and we’ll post about it there I’d be
great to see as many friendly faces

possible we always like you know mean
hang out with people come to the show

up course I yeah anything else on to say

sees the cheese yeah it’s easy cheese
dog I guess we’ll be back towards

that redirecting to our website I’ll
once we’re done pinout rec room for

hooking us up

royal with his fat stuart is new even be
a great day

for the weekend %uh yeah we had a

you awesome opening theme song number
these ones are submitted by you guys

so if you think you can come up with
something as good as or slightly worse

than what we’ve been playing

we want to hear that but not better on a
better with that we we feel like we’ve

already played to a bit onto any better
wanna make feel

anyone feel any worse than they already
do %uh that opening one was from Caleb

and this last one

is from Maddie later time

test good sann I’m

do I yes



kidding me yeah


here say for you care so times 10 really
you know

you hand

it bill

is for you show lead

gmail a coral

goal that was our apps are once again if
you guys can check out Hulu Plus dot com

slash a mere

it would really help us out we can keep
doing these bonus episodes on Thursday

and I at we really appreciate everything
thanks guys

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