Episode 77: Mother’s Day/Butt Plugs

Description:

In this episode we discuss moms, ukeleles, and stinky situations.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace.com – the easiest way to build a professional looking website! Check them out!

say Jake yeah now say Jake

Jake great this episode is brought to
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would you have me do that before i jus
wanna do a

assert my dominance over you to Eric you
in a way to follow my

a I guess more than lead command I like
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J

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yes absolutely I i have glasses and
Hannah and I am NOT

party is shared yeah okay I’m very

neurotic but I don’t know how to I don’t
actually put my nose to the grindstone

and study coded

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and you see how they got their own
little dot com yeah I believe

worth it just for that it’s so hard to
figure I don’t mean pouring in masking

right

it’s interesting her a domain and cost
money

a even if he is wanna buy the domain
separately same as well you Squarespace

a yeah once I got say about that

a this is our one year anniversary
episode we come to the realization

somewhere in the middle that podcast

I’m it was special nonetheless and it
did get real so

don’t worry about that Israel to get
started enjoy everybody

EQ CKC doing

thing whom I need to stunning sure to
delight

delivered

little the usual

doing they will let any hungry

goals list heard

the to slid the

games saloon

lines or at least show

problem this the money

this stunning the

so

i’ll i’ll hell yeah loser

no the ECU play uke you’re the loser

lot how to play any instrument yeah I
any just disparage people who do

but at least that our I’ll pretend to

player normal size guitar and use it
just little

a little a little dinky one yeah you
gotta do that

free at night to be analyzed sized hail
the doesn’t pretend it’s another

instrument

necessary did they get real with the
ukulele is traded through Tues

I think they’re all districts does so
you are cut to a guy playing the ukulele

others the way you said you’re not
fooling anyone

has the i’d give you a dollar but nice
try

look at these guys you trying to present
love as a good tired clearly had not

heard from other

tiny why pp huge honor for daily use a
template six-inch guy playing a normal

size guitar but I saw

right there a his life but a it’s small
and me too

it or not a trick it’s not an allusion
it does small

a rhodes booing me um that guys name was

Ethan Ruby I like you can really I like
that follows solidus on Eileen Gray who

wrote it as he was singing it

what do you mean he’s like they still
try to give you advise

actually I can’t promise that okay yeah

their songs like that were like big
their lyrics contradict each other

yet sneakers you would you do imagine
the person my writing that down

a right recording them Third Reich

saturday in the park I think it was the
fourth of July at Lake before you record

the song just go make sure

double-deck a later day in the park it
was there were 2i

and now that I think about it was the
second in July

I it was definitely the 2nd July North
like that

Elton John song always liked you see I
for got near

they agree you know they’re blue who

ozone was with I yet Isaac else’s

if I was a sculptor but then again
knowing you

yeah alright the don’t use that land

it is undoubtedly I did not to be a
sculptor

yeah up but then again

no animus understand the decide the song
is a gonna be about me

being a sculptor not to go be a painter
and then again no

then again no so no song hey this is if
I really only a bass pod cast on the

internet hosted by us

I’m Jake and I’m a mere IQ I feel bad we
can go back to do

I you know this is our one year

this is the one year anniversary show
this is really

yeah this the our first episode was made
12 2013

Art on May 13th 2013 and now it’s man
and

today it’s a in podcast land may twelfth

2013 holy shit happy Anniversary rather
yep

anyway ISO University meet you

brother brother up this is also the

I think the latest we’ve recorded a
podcast like

its its Sunday night at 9:45 p.m.

as the lives we recorded yes or like the
closest to its being released down to

the wire yeah like that this is a
disorder line lot borderline live

yeah because we didn’t have to turn it
around if there’s any mistakes in it I

apologize I

we got time to listen to it borderline
portal I live

and 100 percent irresponsibly had
negligent

we ran at a time we procrastinate was
mother’s day to day

oh yeah added to your mother I did see
my brother yeah it was your brothers

day-to-day

yes and his mother so I went up to I
Michael it’s cool

um so how does it work people

are in difficult places obviously layers
israeli life isn’t good

always like a let’s grips AV I

duo intro it that way you know it’s not
all the

the onus is on all on you so I quise so

would but we say the same exact thing
all the time people are in

people are in me people right people are

what he say I say people are

in a in a difficult place in their line
as they dire straits

straight a stretch its again and again
no

I eilat rather be getting ready K people
are

let’s not alert people are in difficult
places in their life tires straitche

and and so what they do is they email us
email us that if I were you show

at gmail dot com and we do our best to
answer their questions

let’s get started alright we have that
we have that are courted

all we have to do is practice those
lines I i know i ok here I will give the

mail straights everything I

you take a photo I accidentally took
just a click on picture I’m laying here

certainly

have been bigger brighter them both out
is understood tell you

the most discomforting found when you
land a code certain both

its with boat acute ever going on drogen
embarrassing know I’d like to be cottage

thickness services produce hearing and
I’ll be opened

a break a.m. like a trucker

rest up Blake there’s just like a big a
trucker guy right

few the actor is like just a big ol
scary-looking trucker yeah

and then people come in and they’re
making next to me you just hear the fan

tonight on camera this

only display that you I still available

we’re actually doing better than so they
can’t get mad it’s not really like it

they

some people look over at him going to
take a picture and then

sometimes you should look at them
attentively use take a picture i mean

about that urinals nectar yeah

yes service that urinal a really good

mill Jimmy Fallon I believe it is

Jimmy Jimmy Fallon do you think it’s
Jimmy et

The Tonight Show you know to my peers
Jimmy Fallon a gmail

a lot of people you know and that’s
probably a lot of celebrities

just have their names a gmail I have
thought about that before and i actually

am mary-kate and Ashley Olsen a gmail
dot com Bret

me I really a pretty I don’t know if I
can’t believe that but yeah I

by re also started Paul de nos Twitter a

the you troll it future although Paul
Dano

there’s a real Paul Dano I you made a
fake Twitter account were appalled and i

really did do that

luthy they could find it its what a
small-time prank

a big doesn’t have oh my god had the
real Paul Dano

I the Rio I don’t think the real Paul
there yet the real Paul Dano

the bio this is a pair no account it can
load

allow every day they really did you find
danas people finally got to you

like to you I alright let’s get started
let’s a.m.

answer these questions real really
emails for real people we’re going to

give them fake names to preserve their
anonymity

the ever fake name theme for this a
person I’m let’s do

kid they would elementary school with
okay the

who wrote this email Joe I I really
upset not truthfully

I lets the

let’s calm Joe W you Joe does the rates

hello guys I’ve been dating an amazing
girl for a few months

gorgeous brilliant the whole nine yards

our sex life is for the most part pretty
good but there’s one a rough spot

she has never let me go down on her not
once

not ever she gives me headache asian
lily and I could probably ask you to do

more but I’d feel greedy not
reciprocating

what’s more sure tell me why she won’t
let me go there

at first she said she’d be too loud but
then when we are in a more private place

I still got rebooked I try every few
times were fooling around but whenever I

get down there she clamps hurt

legs and clams right up pun intended

so how do I go about fixing this orel
problem

I really enjoy eating girls out plus not
to brag would have been told I’m pretty

damn good at it

and we all know what Uncle Ben meant
when he said with great power comes

great responsibility was actually

if you’re good at eating pussy eat pussy
thanks guys

excuse you Huggle band Michael Byrne

as a sorta like the opposite problem
love a

most people aren’t like I want my girl
or gotta go down on me and they want

this is like I wanna do it to them and
they won’t let me

I can understand why he’s gone from Road
I would be devastating to me if I if

I was with somebody who didn’t like I’m
to receive oral sex

devastating even though she was down to
give you oral sex yeah I’m

I love a.m. doing that earlier

it’s one of my favorite would you be
more devastated than if it were the

other way around

um I would rather

interesting you’d rather you’d rather
receive than give it

no I think I’ma rather get you rather
give it

yeah like a pitcher lines 8th of OCT
yeah

I mean I’d rather do both at the time
after time it’s not I would I don’t

think I would be with somebody who

will like didn’t like Burnett life but
at least like

you know it’s interesting to tell what
do you think it is about not wanting to

get it I have I met girls who

don’t like you like it yeah I guess it
grosses them out

red think there’s like an insecurity
thing am i some girls maybe

and some guys do that maybe people just
like aid don’t want you to go down on me

cuz I think my vagina looks weird

I males weird I think I I don’t want to
be that close to it

and then also maybe maybe some

girls like super sensitive there and
it’s not actually

it like it’s actually not pleasure both
almost like being tickled

you know take it’s too intense well geez

imagine that too intense that which
sounds like a good thing but you as you

wouldn’t want them to just be tickling
you

at student I it tickling is too intense

stay close in 10 all go down on a girl

%uh letters like my dick but taken to I
don’t let me hey you know you don’t want

anybody yes or have we doing your
ribcage

are love being taken I did not agree on
the blood goes once

probably a so what do you do in this
situation

um how do I go about fixing this orel
problem is this was something he hasn’t

done anything

he hasn’t Lake really am

gone he hasn’t wow I it can’t I’ll

camping the word and I might never be
able you I think I think this is the end

dealing with the problem head-on but
when you’re done

now that’s a good plan now earlier you
mean even broaching in non-sexual way

just like fuckin same what you’re
thinking right now is like

they talked about urges like it would be
too I I would be too loud

and I know that and that the expected at
an excuse

right why I understand him like
accepting it first

so then but then you tried more private
setting ages does that now geez

claiming up on him then I think you
should maybe there’s an issue that could

be worked out like a will

do not like that and then she could say
I’m

you be the reason why she doesn’t maybe
you could quell her fears maybe she’ll

say I think my vagina is weird he said
Egypt best-looking

genovese my whole life like I think it’s
Adam I think it’s gonna at the Earth’s

million you say it smells like roses

energy and then you go down hernia holy
shit actually nevermind year I could and

then immediately bombing all night

all baby

why did you let me do this you should
continue its own server is an excuse

i think is today’s yes they like what’s
up with the deal

tell me that color negatives as a few
this year to open its not place undue

strain really are looking up with you as
you build a

have community better communication here
just at least ariel is bring it up what

not why

Olga if the site is not about the sex
pussy a

a bigger biggest neighbors this
conversation right now being broadcast

to tens of thousands of people

mom sorry being podcast id okay

that underline live podcast an

yeah I would say at a he hasn’t even at
told asked her about it

yeah he should do that you should do
that you should talk to her about it

I all the love like this is my

might talent is being wasted on it yeah
that’s like having their first

I’m a Casanova its locking Michael
Jordan in a gymnasium and I giving a

ball

I is that so wasted potential here trust
me I’m the spider-man

over going down and six what does that
mean

with the Uncle Ben the spider-man

reference I love I’ll

did not get that I thought he meant the
race guy

whose uncle ben’s rice I if the company
is got the

on gold the race companies said with
great power comes great responsibility I

about it was a really good writers I

no I think that’s rice-a-roni yeah

it it was either the San Francisco treat
or with great power comes great

responsibility

yeah to either way I’d two parts water
one part rice

please don’t destroy this a great great
responsibility you have

um alright do you have a

the other female elementary school
friends there for the second question

oh yes um

Saira see Sarah C

okay this is sort of mothers day themed
question didn’t perfect timing

hey guys recently my husband and I have
been talking about starting a family

we are both really excited but I’m a
little worried about becoming a mom

my husband has a great relationship with
his family they are very close and talk

a lot

I on the other hand still have a lot of
resentment towards my parents due out on

her

do to earn unhappy childhood my mom has
a criminal record and my dad barely

bothers to conceal his

old-school sexism around his daughter’s
we do not talk

any more than once a month and I do not
a very much respect for either a fun

I’m worried that I won’t know how to be
a good mom because this

and my husband is such an amazing person
I don’t want to disappoint him or our

child

Jake often talks about his are some
loving relationship with his mom

so I was wondering if you guys could
share some other things that your

parents did too far

to foster your relationships and keep
you guys close into adulthood

thanks sincerely Sarah C

oh my goodness it sucks cuz

she can’t be a good mom Wright brothers
have hey its stories we ever

I was gonna say maybe she has the kid
gives it to the husband and then leave

have a cock because like it has been he
deserves the kids going to be a good

cause and he had a good

he had to get parents your and that way
she doesn’t aim to him

that’s like we’re girls about how much
she tries its not gonna happen if you

like

I’ll say a.m. one one

dues and advice before I go into I’m
gonna cuz i’ma tell my mom how much I

love

Thursday you bet your fuckin ass I’m
gonna tell because you can actually call

a

I i didn’t call it a day Hannah um

though I think you can learn by

bad example as well as by example

you were raised in a household where
parents showed you how not to do it your

husband was

raising household where his parents
showed him how to do it so you guys

actually make a perfect

team allowed to perfect pay and you
could see who does it better now

sort of like a competition was right
guide you to quickly turning negative

yeah it’s only a few it’s a it’s
impressive see you get you get 10 points

for you know I G every old English I’ll
Titian

just burning it would end the winner is
the winner gets

the the kids inheritance if he or she
should perish so I don’t have money

the ideal his actual cash yup yeah life
is that your whole life is just money

life is not a zero-sum game life is a 1
800 000 A K a million cash game

with the winner gets care he he you’re
broke

I yeah cuz I’m at again yet

I I wanted did you know you saw your
mother today

yeah was a nice yells nyse: as I was fun
to hang out with my mommy

did you tell you love doing I don’t have
till you cuz I doubt you have

during your period don’t say I love you
iron

rarely yeah I don’t know will

did you sell your money later today now
you know is that I love you

no I show it in different ways I don’t
have to say an hour to fake it with the

words

great review faded I love how I show
that you lover

I’ll give her a hug and say happy
mother’s day if you like I give her a

card and a five dollar bill

they take you out every meal today yeah
I would never have a perennial I C

okay on you’re a bad sign I

I tell my mommy I love her right now
your mom and my mom are opposite

I we are talking about this a few weeks
ago I’m or the other week

when we went to we’re in San Francisco

yeah we’re going to the baseball game
and you’re talking you’re

mom on the phone and is like who’s going

how you gonna get there the trainer
cabaret what time is the game

was picking you up to take his pick you
up Rajai

and and it’s all logistics yeah

with like who’s there what’s this had
whether it was happening with this

but she’s reading it journalism article
yeah and then I talk to my mom was a

giver to a Giants game which is like huh

was an amazing ike

dude is love to know my feelings my mom
has never even used the word amazing

that she ever ask you how you feel about
something

I’m sure but she’s barely she’s like

at nine spiritual rates are like me you
also came to the realization the other

day that your mom is like you and your
dad is like me

right yeah which is why I think that
we’re blessed

too low we’re gonna last forever yergin
adopt six kids I really hope so

I um for

so would you like to give your mom a
setup for Mother’s Day

she’s not gonna listen to this podcast
because we don’t have that can have

the relationship either but my mom knows
how much I appreciate her

right good happy I’m her favorite son is
such that I’ve done the best job at

being her child

that’s good I’m her baby boy I would
like to tell my mother

and this podcast that I love you dearly
you’re my mommy

I good and your baby and your

your little boy and you’re my big lady

I it’s not a nice thing I

its I alright I love you mom I

you know it with I’ll say that this is
real this is me being real right now

I wouldn’t be a writer for one for my
mom wall I can I sick and I say the same

thing

wouldn’t I have been a different person
if not for my mom just by a little

cousin we ask you to go to law school
yeah

I and that sort of reverse motivated me
that

I’ll just like this busy woman yes her
husband will learn from our mistakes

perfect I love you man well let’s try to
give this girl some advice

firstly asking to up

non parental dudes

how to be a mom is soo semi-fat and
didn’t live

29 parental those we don’t have kids
what I’m saying

asking two dudes about how to be a mom
is were really out of our comfort zone

here

but here’s the thing: being a good mom

no well everyone says that they’re not
ready to be a mom because you can’t be

ready to be a mom

the only become ready to be a mom is by
becoming a mom

like we do I don’t know how it’s done
and maybe you won’t know how it’s done

to you have the baby

and the most important thing is to give

a lot of effort and a

it seems like you’re going to give extra
effort because you want to overcome this

adversity so if anything you’re more
capable than

people who have had better parents to
becoming a mom and you shouldn’t be

worried

what she say a

are you should be worried they don’t
know how to be a good mom because this

if anything it should motivate you to
become a better mom

and I think it will do just that

call would like woulda would you mind if
I attack take a little bit

the the old the takes place on this yeah

the the I will I will first

submit a counterpoint to that we don’t
know because you and I had moms

the right thing we do know a little bit
about a good parenting

okay I think the word that we’re not a
silly authority but I think it

acceptable that she would ask

to so and so on that on that matter I
dissent

you re her being a good mom amor
disagree with you there too

I it she’s a gucci’s bug no I think you

I i think you’re worse off

if you’re coming with situation like out
to be the best month

fuck it don’t worry nobody tell me
anything I got this you’re like coming

in with such an open mind the year like

how do I how do I B Goode and as soon as
you have that level of self-awareness

then

I think you know you will be good your
hand

your kids gonna help you your house is
going to help you your past experiences

are going to help you

your parents are not going to help you
because Barkham yeah well that the on

your your little baby may not have the
best grandparents

bucket I have a good mom

yeah out a good mama grandparents any
day

I am overlooked thus how many
grandparents

years did you know um all them

you at all for well made his made

first great my grandfather died when I
was like 15

and then then they started Robin but

as I was eighty my other grandma died
then I was like 25 1

my other grandma died and my the campus
still kickin

damn I basically only had one
grandparents by the time I was like

two weeks old I only had one grandparent
left but she stayed alive

a to I was like 22 only a

anyway anyway crying

sorry for things getting a little real
bird as advertise they should have

as with the now let’s get to this
question about a butt plugs

I am turn on the podcast

I we need a guy’s name

um okay it’s not that I don’t have one

I’m just trying to think I’ve like who
my boys were

you know they need yeah Lake okay let’s

let’s call this one Corey C Corey

see rights I do when my girlfriend for
almost two years now and things are

going great

she is trusting funny and quite a smoke
show a got damn dime but here’s my can

hang drum

while browsing the internet the other
day I came across a deal on butt plugs

at a mere five British pounds I couldn’t
afford not to buy one

since it arrived I’ve been toying with
how to approach the subject with my

girlfriend

I don’t even know she’s into that kinda
thing I mean I’ve shoved a finger up

there before she seems to enjoy it

but this is quite a lot more girth than
a finger I’m also worried that if I

don’t say anything soon she might
stumble upon and get the wrong idea that

I’m using it on someone else or even on
myself

how do I bring it up in conversation
with her or could I just get it out next

time we’re havin sex and see what
happens

any help would be greatly appreciated
where is he browsing

where the browsing bed then but the
ideal and butt plugs just came up

you have to specific with surged great
dude

by I tell us you sir does you will just
like bugging you

slut the butt plug out I’m not gonna I’m
not gonna sit here and pretend that that

was the Papa bad

that you click Done and decided to buy
it I was reading the news at butt plugs

dot Oregon hours like 0

but ads don’t come up unless you’re like

who cool click the Add US import know
what exactly is a butt plug that exactly

what it sounds like is a just a dildo
for your butthole

am does it have a string on the end of
it so you can make it out

and see me like a a wooden tampon of
sorts you’ve ever seen a butt plug and

how it i’ve seen a butt plug much

watching porn I’ve never seen a butt
plug in porn

really yeah

well what is it it looks it’s sort of
like he kinda looks like um

like a yo-yo your gold know it looks
like the Aces stayed a little bit

I’ll except you know like now not the
hard edges

boquet to sorta like a mushroom astray

and see you can slide in because it’s
then that the top and then it widens out

towards the base

then at the top winds out toward the
base and then it goes

its it goes very tight and and then
there’s sort of like a

us um is this a cylinder base at the
bottom so doesn’t like slip in areas

that are now

but is there string making like you know
some of them have

the mother i’ve seen someone have like
horse till the end

something that’s strange man is like a
nice I imagine it makes when I look it

up

I I resent that yeah your that

so I will say

there’s nothing wrong with at another

I there’s nothing wrong with desiring

but lives there something wrong with
lying to me about how you came across

the butt plugs

have you ever used one now

that’s pretty intense is it for guys to
use our girls

are both both know anybody with the butt
know the bottle that they were plucked

so this guy bought it thinking that its
growth and would wear it

I mean he do you wear it if it’s a new
is it wearing it

amor I guess in you thought you’d wear
it around during the day

the you like play with that right

um I know I wonder I feel like you can’t
just

show where the buttplug cuz then she’s
gonna be late you’ve had this

you use that on other people are ready
you want to use it to me Lake

got imagine washing a butt plug you have
to really rinse it thoroughly right

members run under some yeah just heard
it I

like you’re cleaning your retainer in
the morning usually breasted toothbrush

on it

hubcap I think you have to have the
discussion with your girlfriend before

you purchase the book like Gabby like

I but his butt plug put it in all its
too late he found a good deal you don’t

want the price to go as I think I would
lie is bake

I am you know I A route like I’m curious
I want to try to use a butt plug would

you be down with that

she’s way less likely to do it if you
just bring it out what did you expect

you thought I was going to europe just

plot a butt plug in and put it in maybe
it’s best at that conversation in the

heat of the moment

that you think like a butt plug during
sexual stuff is much less intense than a

butt plug during like a picnic

no cuz act like you’re taking out a
baguette from the basket and also a butt

plug like the you broach the subject

am E

suddenly at first I don’t like figured
hooking up and then you pull out the

bubbly she might

balk at that she made and we’ll stop
implement clothes on at the mood killer

right but I think you’re you’re out at
lunch and you talk about your sex life

like I am an American so happy there
anything that like a

the UID like me to do sexually with butt
plug is

well I think you say I’m I love I L
stuff I wanna my curious about exploring

the world the

you feel it out to see if she’s down
Nadal you don’t like but steps that you

don’t understand

yes here saying like the buttplate
itself you have to insert it into the

conversation slowly at first

and then you shove it right and %uh you
don’t have the server and then at the

end a conversation

I’ve never seen you struggle more with
this year use my good

I it’s their job performance serve it

I deep yeah I think you

you got it you you you gotta just a
bring it up then introduce the fact that

you

you are gonna buy like never tell her
that you bought the book by without her

knowing

I think this guy should go to prison I I

think sodomy is the same worth dying for

I who think this guy doesn’t deserve to
have a girlfriend

or a life of his own he is hedonistic

mmm-hmm he is motivated by guest the
devil or something worse

and he shouldn’t shove this this
objectors Satan into anyone’s above

rectum

let alone hers mmm and I guess your
advice was good talk to her about it

though I would say do it during the heat
of the moment

I that’s their really now I disagree but
let your

both up abided just this is break time I
want to announce that I found the

up the ball there a Twitter okay at this
is good

it is break time a great cuz I’m might
talk more into the mic and a favorable

miss it I

this is my this is I guess like

the started a Twitter wow this is crazy
may

May 10th Ono it’s only March a

whether I just found one for May 10th
2012 I have letter in February

to somebody on our subreddit shutout are
slashed Jake in the air

a said that we are one-year anniversary
the podcast is coming up

and then I realized that it’s also like
the is it 7

year seven year anniversary of the Jake
and Amir video starting

also in May to feel like we only start
shit in May

then a year later list with this Twitter
account also started not made though and

Marci a

still spring you’re counting it straight
dude

I think they were in bloom that will
that the the rebirth

our brains I agree a so how many tweets
do you have from this Paul Dano account

they’ll also why did you start it

I think I was just like I just have been
really bored

I I’m I have 36 tweets:

this its i’m following seven people

and I have 1600 fall 1600 pretty good

that’s a lot seizes the first

3 black up the first they had to it was
eclipse

Ben the next day ed tweeted solar
eclipse I

then the next day tweeted total lunar
eclipse

so your day like the game here is that
bald and as justice is that it is a

might like just like some weird way

yes drawl a G hobbyist well I think I
just wanted to see me really really deep

in

artsy and sorta like gotcha and and the
US but then

I am really there’s also a whole bunch
have

what was the last week the one they did
in may have 2013

the week we started this podcast um

with the lot the last one AD I did was
September 27 2012 and I just threw

complete so what did you say was in May

it started in March you thought it was
me yeah it said and AR

or because he you saw three and you
thought those that

numerical I think ok with that but I no
I’m I was scrolling it was on May and I

thought it’s cool for the bottom but I
had it shoot with something now

brother should I did sixteen hundred
followers somebody’s name Jim tweeted at

Emily’s

then I at the real hard and I met you in
Kali man you remember me we hung outside

the hotel

and i’d is Robak yeah I

did so subtle because you’re not trying
to make him sound bad or good I’ll

he’s also a celebrity that would never
actually have a Twitter account you’ll

never find out about this it seems

I I had the we have found it is now is a
Google Paul Dano Twitter

they came up yeah on what a funny tweet
to do after a year

are you really the Paul Tanner are you
really the real Paul Dano and I wrote

yeah

I up hmm

and others later with a lie oh man
you’re absolutely mad in there will be

blood reminds me the religious freaks we
have been

North Carolina her and I just wrote back
thx

I users though there’s no reason to do
this

Bell added slow boring you’re not making
his statement

hmm I guess

the only fitting thing that I could
write is that and

maybe a maybe re-tweet J community

I these guys are actually

on point in a way and I feel like the
blonde one is a better actor than me

I really can’t believe it’s a funeral
parlor they’ve been local

in two years dollars sad for ball then
I’ll

the daynard Anna and I will bring to
find out

I how feel you to tell us

we’re going on they know called an hour
with Danno bald and I’ll go on record as

saying it danell

and I don’t care from rock book em Danno
another thing that I will want to

mention during the break is that our

our show at the Hollywood Improv is
almost sold out but not quite yet

our live podcast Saturday May 31st so

that link is at our site if I really
show dot com

a or a key is Google a fiery Show Live
Hollywood improv

a.m. you know any of their lives
Hollywood improv you know they’re just

like different ways to use the search
engine we have a show coming up in New

York

when june twelfth really you see be

I’ll okay there we go june twelfth you
really buy tickets for that

I heard it here first are triumphant
return to New York City

oh my god nobody shows up I just to
prove up by candlelight

poop all day knows there I well well
well thought out the old pier

I confront me does that for a lunar
eclipse dead are you thick book I’m

sorry

I loved you in the milkshake movie has
let slip that all those polled honest

about what people think it’s really the
real Paul Dano it’s a six-minute long

podcast

up how many times a day do you think
somebody else milkshake at part an hour

I drink your milkshake

um twice what’s not bad actually

pretty good considering can’t consider
how many times you get called the page

the paint but forget about that

yeah never forget I ready for the last
question

yet I am IOM

I am arm

the girl’s name

let’s call this gal Leslie H

cool very nice you in this episode
should be called mothers day or butt

plugs

I I believe we should do mothers day
slash but like that’s funny

thank you but hmm magazine

the air hey guys so I have a friend who
is always complaining about never having

been in a relationship

and how she doesn’t understand why guys
don’t like ur she isn’t lacking in

self-esteem seeing as she’s always says
how she think she has a great

personality

and she has a really pretty face which
she does

she always just blames it on the fact
that she’s kind of a plus sized girl

and while that may or may not be the
reason she’s single I am

going to bed it’s the fact that she
smells really bad

she only showers every three to four
days and never washes her clothes

I already had to ask you to stop the car
because she

because there’s smell made me sick and I
blame that on motion sickness

she has a really nice she’s a really
nice person and a good friend but how do

you tell a friend that they smell so bad
it literally makes you sick

everyone around her complains behind her
back and they tell me I have to say

something because it won’t sound mean
coming from me

just curious to see what you would do
thinks

of this question breaks my heart is now
we’re gonna go out

feel so sad lie shares in easily
solvable problem

know that was gonna be so sad and she’s
like you have to take showers you smell

bad that doesn’t like how long a big
deal been talking about this

well I don’t know how long have you been
taking good the biweekly showers what

sort of days as Bahrain

and what is not although six days
without showering yeah and it’s bad

do I smell bad probably buy you a better
use it a lot of time with me do I ever

Snowbird

a sometimes I guess I wouldn’t say

worth such as have booo theater if you
go ninety days that showering

of course that hot how do you go that
long I shower but you feel dirty

I like feeling dirty you like feeling
sticky I like feeling sticky like

feeling dirty like smelling my own b.o

I love going to bed happen just showered
wet hair

clean pj’s and a shirt and socks

you it yet you’d let I were a lot of
close to sleep

I sleep completely naked year we often
see each other in the

the bathroom in the morn right I’m
wearing a baggy t-shirt

pajama pants and socks and your

your nude your naked

your next time you know your to be fair
you’re not wearing pants right now

hurts to next time you make a nice way
here this

make you really nervous a who’d I so

you smell always can omit just a general

dilemma is like your friend hasn’t
easily fixable issue but you don’t want

to look

you don’t approach it like I’ve had this
issue with friends are like

all this geyer this girl does this one
thing and

they can just not do it and everybody
would like them or and as your friend

who would help

you be very helpful %uh tell them what
it is ray but im icon at the sacrifice

if making it weird for that next couple

days weeks or like having something your
teeth your fly down it’s like a little

uncomfortable to tell somebody

reggae pick your teeth but i think is a
the

as a person I’d rather have that moment
I love discomfort and then have clean

teeth

and this is like a you know the a bigger
scale

problem the Mac has yet to have like a
real on country conversation but I

wonder if you could just be a lake

you’re like wow you can smell bad today
0

and that was last time you showered this
week yep just like he is now that today

at your most shit you could start it now

pretend that it just started to be a
problem so you like

I think the the thing that painful is is

say it like with anything like this you
say something you like

how long has this been building up how i
feel but I can we have a back alley I

smell bad

see you say a snow bad as if you’re
saying it for the first time he just

noticed

and it’s that what really they did you
shower today own I said

that nice out four days ago and then she
showers and then that’s good

I’ll italian girls positive reinforcer
like the Giants

and the next time she smelled again
you’ve already established that you’ll

just say something

so to get you getting a card like whoa
you reek and is like welts

like don’t believe that I yeah I think
you used and is now a bit you enjoy our

your hair is greasy Taylor you but like
he played out like it this is just the

new relationship this is what you’ve
discovered

right not like this is pent up for so
long I finally have to say something you

smelling you always have

I totally agree with telling people that
I have a personal story that

this reminds me of where somebody told
me something where like I was already

doing the thing

so I remember in highschool I heads its

I had acne greasy face red face

and wanna my female friends a while
you’re on the phone once is like

by the way you like you know you can
like like d like know about like

clear cell in like Neutrogena like this

like jelly light wash your face a lot
yes I know about that

and they say okay I just saying like
maybe it’ll help you out other I’m

already using that

habits I well have backfired as belts

I just felt like art now I know
everyone’s talking about my skin and

also I’m already doing that thing they
use the jersey

so nothing’s gonna we’re now live girl

you talk to me that the only thousandth

I could take in this world that people
were paying as much attention to my

paces I would be identified pay the know
I know that’s not true

I had the worst tribal acne which was
like bad but not bad enough they have

accutane

just like that the the miracle pill that
just destroys your entire body and also

acne

really yeah he did as the accutane is
like an atomic bomb it like thins out

every

cell in your body it’s like it does stop
acne but also it makes your eyes yellow

and dry your fingernails

then you’re nosed out as he really
wanted at the table I definitely wanted

clear skin

yeah and let me know that’s right kids
with their skin than me he had better

skin within six weeks because they had
accutane

now isn’t there like a charm with I
wonder if accutane is still legal like

that shit was fuckin dangerous

goes like a really only like it only

people kept using it because teens hades
it’s that much like yell fuck out okay

for causes depression and suicidal
tendency crazy words are like you

there were I don’t know there’s a real
story if it was just like an actor they

told us in health class but there is
like

these kids were using they’re like
sniffing some type of clue to get high

and they’ll put labels on all over this
clearly I don’t that they like you it’s

dangerous

whatever whatever do you still doing it
and then they just printed on the label

like

sniffing was clearly causes breakouts
and they stopped

are yet its itself I like kids will do
anything as long as it means they don’t

get sit fifth visit to the fucking worst

I remember and is there a couple months
ago and it was ready to deal with the No

in years he is couldn’t stop they
couldn’t stop thinking about it

I am I just pulled it up and it says
pulled from the market

accutane still available nonetheless and
I was in 2012

so I guess they did eventually a

poll accutane though it still available
through generic manufactures

right like it all I’ll take suicidal
thoughts and thin feature details are

having suicidal but because their best
year

but God so I did this person do

bring it up as if it’s a new problem
further that’s what I would do

like you treated as it as you

you’d you treat it like you should have
from the beginning

you should have said something right
away if it was like bother you as a

friend

yeah but don’t sit her down to make a
big deal out I i think thats

that’s where that’s the danger that we
agree like hey look we have

is an intervention for your stench right
inter stanchion

yes denture vention I am

yeah it’s getting that’s really good
actually thank you I am

because im pretty good at the sole
advice thing her after a year we’re not

actually have

bad anymore oh my god her now have good
which is the same amount a bad and there

were just more optimistic girl confident

as the yeah thanks so much for listening
guys

and thanks if if you listen to every
episode I’ve maybe we should send

them like a money yeah like 25 bucks
cash

that’s cool we have advertisers we can
afford it

I thanks for listening to this absurd
and

any episode you’ve ever listen to we had
yet traffic is still going up

I remember the first week we’re like
that we should have been doing this a

bit like a a appreciation

yeah we should we should be telling
stories from the very the very first but

get lie remember the very first podcast
came out and I V

told ’em my then girlfriend

you know could just talk about your
first tag are a time heroes like I

really hope that it just breaks 20,000
listeners the first week like I don’t

know I

where I got that number but I was like
20,000 know we could be really cool

and a it eventually it broke 20,000
within like the first couple days

and by then the first week at like
twenty-five thousand

alright this is huge this is cool in
like we’re like climbing the iTunes

charts

an hour episodes get 25,000 listens
within the first day

button dope so that means next year will
be getting fifty thousand a day

and the year after that it’ll double
done and the year after that

don’t this is as holding a gun to a band
I

did you hear that it’s even to start
spreading the word see

play is no turn a dub accutane with
murder

year so thanks guys I and that email
address

again is a fiery show at gmail dot com
if you have your own questions

we are still opening and closing every
single episode with new themes on

submissions the first awesome so named
Ethan Ruby

this last one is from somebody named
Jack

hijacked to Jack in total you guys will
be back next week

peace drive done

dare the way debris

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